Fabio Capello looks for future England players at the Newcastle v Spurs match
Amonst those that caught his eye were, Yohan Cabaye, Rafael Van der Vaart, Gabriel Obertan, Shola Ameobi, Emmanuel Adebayor, Demba Ba, Jonas Gutierrez, P. Løvenkrands, R. Pavlyuchenko, and Y Kaboul!
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Mubarak sons own Swiss millions and Rolls too!
Ex President Mubarek's sons own millions in a Swiss bank, they also have their fair share of Swiss Rolls too (?) Poor Egyptians.
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100 year old man completes marathon and drops dead!
A 100 year old man successfully completed the marathon then he dropped dead proving that sport is really deadly!
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L'Oreal heiress is too loony to count her fortune!
L'Oreal heiress has been declared insane by her children because she couldn't count her fortune any more, but they certainly can!
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Van Gogh did not kill himself, it was suicide bomber crow!
It has been proven that Vincent van Gogh did not kill himself. It was a sucide-bomber crow that did it or at least that's what he told his brother. Good job he was slightly Loony!
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Little Pea's pea shooter pee's Liverpool off!
It required the Little Pea to shoot down Liverpool with his pea-shooter in the very mediocre Liverpool-Man United non-affair. And that really "peed" the Scousers off!
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Middle East debt swap?
Palestinian leaders have offered Israel the chance to swap debts to help ease their financial troubles. They would like to swap every $1000 of their own debt for $1 of Israeli debt.
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The Follow Up On Glenn "The Crying Fool" Beck
Glenn Beck was asked if he still cries a lot. He grinned and replied "Only when I talk."
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Ozzy Osbourne Has Never Been One To Mince His Words
Ozzy Osbourne was asked what he thought about Ron Paul making fun of the way he talks. Ozzy shook his head and remarked "Ahhhh wellllll IIIIIII Uuuuummm Shhhharonnnn!"
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Kathy "The Red Vicious Cougar" Tells It Like She Sees It
Kathy Griffin says she's kinda sad that Sarah Palin has decided not to run but she doesn't blame her because that one night of (BLANKING) certainly would have cost her the basketball wives vote.
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Reverend Al Sharpton Has His Doubts
Reverend Al Sharpton was asked about GOP black candidate Herman Cain. He shook his head and said, "Well, lemmy say dis - da boy he ain't no black brutha. He gotta be a real dark Egyptian or sumtin."
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Street Lamps to be turned off as Town Halls forced to save cash!
On a happier note, free MPs trips to Taiwan, Bahrain, Jamaica and India, along with guaranteed free legal aid to defend against any charges of expense fiddling will not be affected.
Oh goody!
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The Prime Minister shows his compassion to the unemployed!
David Cameron, who's never been unemployed, or ever will be on the bread-line, claimed it was 'disappointing' that we now had 2.57+ million people unemployed.
He finished his champagne and left!
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The Singing Cowboy And The Singing Cowgirls Will All Learn Someday (Maybe)
Hank Williams Jr. says he'll be recording a song with The Dixie Chicks titled, "Dammit Y'all Maybe One Day We'll All Learn To Just Sing Our Damn Freakin' Songs And Shut The Eff Up."
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Joe Biden Sure Does Know His Animals
Vice-President Joe Biden was asked what he thought about Michele Bachmann. He paused for a moment, took a bite from his hamburger, and said that he's seen prettier hair on a Yak.
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Joan Rivers Knows All About Femininity And Stuff
Joan Rivers said Sarah Palin would not have had a chance of winning even if she had run because the American people want women to look like women and not like Rick Santorum dressed up as a woman.
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Jon Huntsman - The Man That No One, But No One Knows
GOP presidential candidate Jon Huntsman admits that the only person in America who is probably less recognizable than him is his gardener Chang Chow.
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Obama administration drops part of healthcare law that offers insurance
WASHINGTON, D.C.--The Obama administration today dropped the part of the new healthcare law that would provide Americans with health insurance, thereby making the plan much more financially sound.
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written by
Lyndon, 17 October 2011
