Hardened Criminal
Reports just in say that several bottles of Avena syrup were found in Osama Bin Laden's hideout. A type of herbal Viagra, it was used to make him look like a hardened criminal - very frightening!
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Hot Ronaldo fails the "AXE" test!
Ronaldo was recently seen with sweaty armpits at a tennis match featuring Nadal with his sizzling Russian girlfriend who had a sweaty pussy after watching Nadal, they both failed the AXE test!
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Spoofwriter Denies Revealing Super-Injunction Celebrities in Order to Gain 34,000 Thumbs up!
The spoof writer In Seine has today denied trying to reveal a number of celebrities who have taken out super-injunctions in order to gain 34,000 thumbs up. "You can but try!" he said.
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Cats in Danger
The SoftyPuss charity has warned that cutting down trees is endangering the future existence of cats. Without the trees to sharpen their nails, the cats will find it impossible to walk.
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written by
j.w., 09 May 2011
Strawberries Early This Year
The summery weather has resulted in strawberries being ready for eating from British producers a month earlier than usual. The Wimbledon Tennis Tournament has been brought forward a month as a result.
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written by
j.w., 09 May 2011
Man seen with Dog in Park
Police are following up leads which they hope with result in them finding the Man with a Dog in a Park.
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written by
j.w., 09 May 2011
Twitter is Super
Super Twitter has shown itself to be one up on the old fashioned judicial system.
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written by
j.w., 09 May 2011
Bin Laden Alive and Well
Three Days after Bin Laden was laid in a Watery Grave he returned to his disciples who welcomed him back. 'Those infidels think they know it all' he cried.
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written by
j.w., 09 May 2011
Donald Trump Is Being Sued For Wasting America's Time
In a move many said was coming, the U.S. government has filed a $10.5 million lawsuit against Donald Trump due to the fact his 'birth certificate' bullshit wasted a lot of President Obama's time.
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The Mormons Fire Right Back At The Pope!
After the Pope criticizes the Mormon Church for its stand on multiple wives, they issue a directive telling the Pope to worry about his priests and to be sure and not bend over when one is around.
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The Tea Bag Party May Be Going Bust
The Lipton Tea Company has informed Sarah Palin's Tea Bag Party that they need to change their name or face a name infringement lawsuit.
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Venus and Serena Williams Just Keep Winning The Awards
The tennis playing sisters Venus and Serena Williams have just been named as the Heaviest two sisters to ever play the game of tennis.
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Sex May Lead to Aneurysms
As scientists discovered that having sex could lead to aneurysms, women around the world rejoiced as they now have another excuse to not have sex.
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Congress Balances Budget With A $1.5 Trillion Groupon
"We've been waiting for this Deal of the Day for years now," said House Speaker John Boehner. "I even got a free pepperoni pizza for referring a friend."
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Abbotabad Villagers Claim That Film Is a Fake!
The villagers in Abbotabad where Bin Laden was supposed to have been killed last week claim the film is a fake. One of them said: "This is Abbotabad as it gets!"
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Bad Headline Number 85
Miners Refused to Work after Death.
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Donald Trump Refused to Spend Time With His Mother On Mother's Day
Donald Trump told his mother that he will not spend time with her until she reveals her birth certificate. "I do believe she's an American Citizen." Said Trump. "I just want to make sure."
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Bad Headline Number 84
New Study in Obesity Seeks Larger Test Group.
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PPI misspelling
Banks have been accussed of misspelling PPI's as PIP's - thus confusing apple growers who took out policies. There has been a slump in Orchard sales as a result.
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written by
j.w., 09 May 2011
Super Injunction
This breaking news has been censored due to a super injunction.
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written by
IainB, 09 May 2011
Germany buys Greece
In a strange turn of events since WWII ended, the German conquest lives on as Greece was sold to Germany in a secret banker's deal last night. The entire country is pledged as collateral on default.
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New class of super terrorist defined
Anyone not believing anonymous Al Qaeda press releases will be considered worse than Al Qaeda and subject to investigation as a terrorist.
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The Whole Damn World's Gone to Heck!
I didn't even get my copy of the Saturday Evening Post until Wednesday!
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Al Qaeda awarded Pulitzer prize
For supporting the official military-industrial-complex story of the most recent death of Osama. Al Qaeda is now accepted as the authority on everything.
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