Japan nuclear disaster averted!
"Gamera," a giant flying turtle, lifted off from Monster Island to eat the radiation in the Fukushima Daiichi nuclear power plant. "Gamera saved the day!" an official declared...
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Lord Vader discovers Luke's birthday surprises.
"I've felt his presents" the dark one claims.
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Huge wave of apathy sweeps the nation!!!
This morning, as millions of folks were having their breakfast a..............oh f"£% it, what's the bloody point?
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Mouse Spotted On Staircase
There was panic in the Jackson household in Dagenham when daughter Kylie saw a mouse.
'Where did you see it love?' asked Mum.
'There on the stair, right there. I think it had clogs on,' said Kylie.
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True story: What Lady G. said to her students
She boldly told her class, 'Not one of you is playing with a full deck', after counting the cards in 2 packs and discovered only 45 in one pack and 38 in the 2nd. TRUE STORY That's the type she is.
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Inchworm Measures Marigold
Gardening news,and an inchworm was seen measuring a marigold by crawling across the petal and singing and counting as he moved.
Garden Expert Alan Titchmarsh said 'With his arithmetic he'll go far.'
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Italian Soldier Wins Bravery Award
Breaking News from Italy, where war veteran Gepetto Ravioli, 95, has passed away. He remains the only Italian soldier ever to win The George Cross award for bravery.Many don't believe he was Italian.
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US State spokesman ousted for Bradley Manning comment
P.J. Crowley was also handcuffed, jailed, stripped naked, and forced to stand at attention "for his own safety," the new US State spokesman said...
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Savoury Popcorn's A Bit Crap
It's official, at the Annual Savoury Food Awards,the 'It's Just Wrong' Award went to Salt and Vinegar Popcorn.
Awards Organiser Houston Texas agreed, 'It is a shite idea,' he said.
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"sebroF" Magazine Gives Up Ranking The World's Poorest 500
"It's virtually impossible when so many are vying for the top spot! How do you chose 500 from over a billion?"
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Japan Quake: World Watches In Horror As Celebrity Stories Get Sidelined
Even on The Spoof!! Unbelievable!
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Ronnie Corbett to get leg-lengthening surgery
Says he wants to be able to go to the cinema without having to take his 'booster seat' every time. (He hasn't realized that his LEG LENGTH has nothing to do with this situation). Sorry Ronnie!
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Different snippet about Ronnie Corbett to get leg-lengthening surgery
One reason, he wants to take up 'darts' but presently is hitting below the board...Sorry! Bloody frustrating!
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UK gay couple cause bomb scare at Heathrow!
After a row a gay man, a 72 year old OAP, threatened to blow up Heathrow. The police caught him pushing his zimmerframe with a pink handbag, luckily it was only filled up with his dirty pink panties!
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Gaddafi Thanks Japan
Moomoo Gaddafi has thanked the Japanese people, who by their brave sacrifice and heroism in diverting attention from Libya so he can wipe out half his population in peace.
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written by
j.w., 13 March 2011
Children Found Among Garbage
Children have been discovered living in scrapheaps throughout England. Consigned to the scrapheap by an education system that fails to understand the generation that can twit but cannot speak proper.
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written by
j.w., 13 March 2011
Britains Escape Catastrophe
A multitude of sane British people have booked all flights out of the country to coincide with the Royal Wedding. 'Anywhere but here' said one who feared the oncoming deluge of crap.
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written by
j.w., 13 March 2011
History is in the Past
The teaching of history is in the past, complained teachers of the subject meeting in Hastings. 'No one knows about the Beatles any more' said a worried Prof. Dumbledore.
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written by
j.w., 13 March 2011
Prince Andrew Pulls Out
Prince Andrew has Pulled Out in a bid to get support from the Roman Catholic Church. He is due to join The Pope in an abstinence campaign in order to limit world population growth.
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written by
j.w., 13 March 2011
Gaddafi: "The West Is After Our Oil"
"And I am after their money."
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Boxing Update
David Hayes' next fight against one of the Klitschko brothers is to be shown on a U.S cable channel.
Its being labelled as "WBO BO on HBO".
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written by
grimbo, 13 March 2011
