Ashley Cole - "I'm Winning Cheryl Back!"
Fails to explain why he cheated in the first place.
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Rafael must die before Andy can win Wimbledon!
Andy Murray, the great Brit hope, is determined to win Wimbledon, but he has one doubt; as long as Nadal is alive, fit and running, he's got no hope, so someone please kill him!
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Strawberries And Cream At Wimbledon!
Which explains the rain.
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Stripper quits job
She says she couldn't bare it anymore
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Tourists 'Driving Into North Sea'
A spokesman for Poundland has hailed their new sat-nav as a great seller.
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400 UK nudist shark lovers jump into freezing Welsh sea!
400 UK nudist shark lovers determined to prove to the world that sharks detest human flesh jumped into the sea in Wales and no-one was attacked, the sharks couldn't stomach the sight!
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Cher and Her Tattoo Dilemma
Cher, who claims to be the original tattooed lady, says that she has run out of tattoo space on her body, so her next tattoo will have to be put on her large intestine.
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Gary Busey Says He "Gets" Sarah Palin
Gary "The Space Traveler" Busey says that he understands everything that Sarah Palin says. Well who the heck does that really surprise?
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Peter Coyote By Any Other Name?
Actor Peter Coyote says that in order to be more politically correct and to capitalize on the recent trend he is changing his name to Weiner Coyote.
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Lindsay Lohan Is Truly A "Prisoner" In Her Own Home (Poor Baby)
Lindsay Lohan, who is under house arrest, and is serving her jail sentence in the comfort of her own home, wants everyone to know that the rumors that she tried to escape are absolutely not true.
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Wiener exploits his notoriety
Anthony Wiener, the sexting congressman, has announced he will set up a hot dog franchise in DC and sell "wieners" to overweight members of Congress. What next? Monica Lewinsky performing head jobs?
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U.S. Negotiating With Taliban
Deal may include extra virgin over mandatory 72 to every potential suicide bomber or fighter.
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Henhouse Clocks for sale
Get your very own Chicken Tikka
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New Drug Policy
The Government has decided to bring in a no drug policy to help cut the NHS bills.
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written by
j.w., 20 June 2011
Transfers
The latest on the transfer front is that a penny black has been swapped for a stamp issued by Leeds United full back Joe Clogger.
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written by
j.w., 20 June 2011
Wimbledon Lacks Balls
It is feared that Wimbledon will run out of balls before the Tournament is finished. So much rubbish has already been written and commentators are running out of idiotic things to say.
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written by
j.w., 20 June 2011
Recovering alcoholic builds bridge to better relationship
Accomplishes notable engineering feat relying solely on 1,400 plastic vodka bottles discarded by previous alcoholic partner during course of 7 month relationship.
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