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Rating:

MTV jets JERSEY SHORE to VMA awards to disappointment of every single musician

Musicians of all walks bitched out MTV's decision to jet the crew of Shore to the VMA awards to escape "Irene." "First, they piss all over Italy," said one leading rapper, "then MTV rewards them?"

written by Lyndon, 28 August 2011
Rating:

Dalglish admits Andy Carroll is a jurassic head-butter!

Liverpool manager Dalglish has admitted Carroll is a jurassic head-butter who belongs in the kick & Rush (not Ian) era and dropped him for Suarez. FC Barcelona are not interested, logica, Si!

written by Jaggedone, 28 August 2011
Rating:

New Banana Goes On Sale

The world's first exploding banana will go on sale in supermarkets later this week.

written by Darwin, 28 August 2011
Rating:

The Chubby and Not At All Shy Wynonna Judd

Wynonna Judd has said that fellow country singer LeAnn Rimes has gotten so damn skinny that she now looks like a number 2 pencil with hair.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 28 August 2011
Rating:

Oprah Is Looking For An Upstairs Maid and A Downstairs Maid

Oprah Winfrey emailed Sarah Palin and Michele Bachmann and told each one that once Ricky Perry kicks their butts and they drop out of the race she'll hire both of them to be her house maids.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 28 August 2011
Rating:

The Queen & The Joker

Elton John has just announced that he will be touring with Madonna in the nostalgic The Queen & The Joker Concert Tour. Madonna will of course be the joker.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 28 August 2011
Rating:

The Perfect "10"

Charles Barkley has gotten so fat and LeAnn Rimes has gotten so skinny that Fat Boy Barkley could use Olive Oyl Rimes as a toothpick.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 28 August 2011
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