Order by:
Rating:

Snow Makes People Believe Global Warming Isn't Real

85% of ignorant people believe that snow falling from the sky proves that global warming isn't real.

written by UWGB-Beek, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Miller Lite Drinkers Not Full

Miller Lite drinkers are still complaining about not feeling full after drink large amounts of Miller Lite.

written by UWGB-Beek, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Another China Toy Recall

China has announced the recall of their "Li'l Carpenter Lead Tool Set". It has lead in it.

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Peace for our time

British PM Neville Chamberlain couldn't understand German. The paper he waved on the steps of his aircraft at Heston on his return from Munich in 1938 was actually an order for 2000 Spitfires.

written by MostlyHarmless, 08 November 2010
Rating:

US Grizzlies are becoming lazy and obese, they love the human life!

Grizzly bears are becoming increasingly lazy and obese! Instead of hunting for salmon in freezing cold raging mountain rivers and getting stung by honeybees they prefer "Big Mac's" and French Fries!

written by Jaggedone, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Heavy Drinkers Live Longer

New Research: Heavy drinkers live longer than those who don't drink. Apparently enough alcohol has a preserving pickling effect on the body's organs.

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

No I In Team but...

BIRMINGHAM - A P.E. lesson turned to comedy club, as a boy, 15, shouted out that there is 'no "us" in team, either'. As of press time, rearranging the letters in team spells 'me'.

written by Inhopeless, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Cristiano Ronaldo wins libel suit against Daily Telegraph, he's still "poofy" though!

ex Man U super-diver Ronaldo won his libel suit against the Daily Telegraph, he said he wasn't drunk and only danced like an injured "disco queen" to show off his black varnished toe nails!

written by Jaggedone, 08 November 2010
Rating:

No Global Warming

STORM: Scientists to campaign against global-warming skeptics as science war heats up!

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Texas Get Tough Policy Coming?

'Arizona Style' Immigration Law Proposed in Texas. "We pretty well have no choice with the drug wars next door and Americans here legally needing work", says official.

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Prof. Twinkie On Nutrition

Nutrition professor eats only Twinkies, Oreos, Doritos - and loses 27 lbs! "I think I may lose it even faster once it kills me."

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Obama Ready To Roll!

President Obama told reporters today that when his trip overseas ends he plans to take some time off and then begin campaigning for 2012.

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Jobless Rate Actually Higher!

Actual jobless rate put at 14.2% if you add in all the politicians.

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Wayne Rooney gets a supernanny to keep him out of trouble at Nike football camp.

She's under seventy - so not much chance of hanky panky with Wayne, then.

written by Thibarine, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Johnson & Johnson #2

Johnson & Johnson have announced a new pill for erectile dysfunction. Catch their new TV ad: "Nobody knows Johnsons like Johnson & Johnson!

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Johnson & Johnson

Another bright spot in the economy as Johnson & Johnson hires twenty-five more Johnsons.

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Diana Vickers performs in her knickers

Audience at G-A-Y gig don't notice.

written by Thibarine, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Mostly In The Dark

British Scientists: Neanderthals Had More Sex Partners Than You! But BOY were they ugly!

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

New Planes To Get Workout

US Airways to add 500 attendants and pilots plus two new airplanes.

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Woods Speaks Out!

Tiger Woods in interview says that it was worse falling off Elin that it was off leader board.

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Rather Than Be Felt Up!

Woman in Atlanta peals off clothes in line at airport to show she's hiding nothing.

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

No Hiding Place

Only British citizens are allowed on tours of Big Ben as security fears force ban on foreigners. Special nude tours OK'd for all others.

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Britain Really Hit Hard!

Severe weather alert as Britain battered by 70mph winds, snow in the North, up to 3 inches of rain across the South plus that military agreement with France!

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

San Franscisco To Ban Happy Meals

San Francisco Bans Happy Meal Toys! McDonald's Bans Wearing Flowers In Your Hair!

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

New FOX Show #2

New FOX game show promise to 'make grown men cry'. It's called, "My Family's Staying For A Month For Christmas!"

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

For The Third Time!

New FOX game show promise to 'make grown men cry'. It's called "Those Bedbugs Are Back!"

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

New FOX Reality Show!

New FOX game show promise to 'make grown men cry'. It's called "Following The Dallas Cowboys!"

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

George Was Different #2

Bows to Indian Parliament, where George W. Bush nodded head and in Hundi stated "Your Ass Is Fine!"

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

George Was Different!

Bows to Indian Parliament, where George W. Bush yelled "Ya-Ho Tay!" before Laura they weren't Native Americans.

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Obama Bowing Before Indian Parliament

Bows to Indian Parliament, where George W. Bush only did a curtsy.

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Boomers Break The House!

Massive tide of elderly voters drove election result. Dem plans have "Boomer"ranged.

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Boehner Mum On Pelosi Decision

Boehner Mum on News Pelosi Running for Minority Leader, but caught dancing in his office.

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Thought He Was Working Overtime

Supreme Court Justice Thomas silence on latest issues discovered. Others vote 8-0 that he's been dead since last week.

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Another Egg Recall

More eggs recalled after salmonella found at Ohio farm; thus far, no illnesses have been hatched!

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Chavez Launches More Takeovers.

Chavez defends state takeovers of apartments, prostitution, drugs dealers.

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

The Putin Gang

Ex-Moscow mayor sends daughters to London for 'safety' as Putin's enemies keep having bad luck.

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Bikes Built In India

HARLEY-DAVIDSON to build bikes in India. Gandhi's Angels next?

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Obama Proven Wrong Again

HARLEY-DAVIDSON to build bikes in India. Backs up Obama's statement yesterday that India creates jobs, doesn't steal them....WRONG!!

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

You Cost Us Our Jobs!

Defeated Dems Pen Letter to Implore Pelosi to step aside. The ghost of the Dems Present expected next.

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Armed Police Crack Down On Clipjoints!

Armed police raids to stop unlicensed barbers, hair dressers, proctologists, .

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Obama Criticized By China, Russia!

GLOBAL ECONOMY-Obama returns fire after China, Russia slams Fed's move. Says he will take our borrowing elsewhere!

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Your Personalized Drone

New Pandora's box of 'personal' drones that could stalk anyone. Twins are especially worried.

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Joe The Kneebreaker Out Of Work

New Pandora's box of 'personal' drones that could stalk anyone...Mafia perk up their ears.

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

UFO, Pelosi Spotted In DC

Blue-Colored UFO Near DC. Nancy Pelosi says it's there to balance all those red states.

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Everybody In Free World In Debt?

$10,200,000,000,000.00 IN GLOBAL BORROWING! Biggest loaners? China and Mexican Druglords!

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

TSA Searchers Thorough

TSA Fondles Women & Children Refusing Airport Naked Body Scanners! "They hope we do reject scanners", say victims. "That gives them a change to feel us up..look under bigger boobs and check cavities.

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

"Have You Driven A Dong Lately?"

Woods hoping to reap dividend from China charm offensive. Lost another tournament but may have picked up Chinese sponsors.

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

NFL Sunday Roundup!

Browns shock Patriots, Jets and Vikings fight back, Buffalo can't win in Canada either.

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Rehab Changing Lindsay Lohan

Dina Lohan: Rehab 'life-changing' for Lindsay. "From now on, she's Harold Lohan."

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Mixed Blessing

Technology a blessing, a curse for remote island, the same as for everywhere else.

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Just Our Sort!

The Socialite Network: UK's Queen joins Facebook. Also, Hyacinth Bucket!

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Bloomberg Going Electric

Bloomberg to promote electric taxes in cities...that should be 'electric taxis'!

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Sloth Identified

Researcher IDs Ice Age sloth bone in Colorado. "His name was "Sammy"!"

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Clinton Sneaks Back Home

Clinton back on US soil after marathon Asia tour, the slaughter of the democrats!

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Playboy Art Auction

From Salvador Dali's 'Melting Cocks' to Marilyn Monroe, Playboy auctions art

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

NYC Marathon Results

NYC Marathon: Guts from Chile, glory for Ethiopia, search party for Bear Wallow, Kentucky man as he took off in the wrong direction.

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Nuke Plant Closes

Vt. nuke plant closes after radioactive water leak, Homer Simpson Lookalike seen on premises.

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Iraqi To Split Leadership?

Iraqi rivals in bid to end political deadlock. Could be Shiite president, Sunni VP? Kurds declare civil war.

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Can't Hurt It Any

German nuclear waste train arrives at destination, Chernobyl!

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Obama: India A World Power

Obama hails ties with 'world power' India. "I think I have a couple half-brothers here also", he tells Indian reporters.

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Myanmar Another Burma!

Thousands flee Myanmar clashes after election. Leaders: We said you can vote, not that it counted!

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Attention Hypocrite Watchers!

MSNBC says Olbermann will be back on air Tuesday...that is if anyone cares to see a genuine modern hypocrite.

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

A Wart From Them Could Be Rough

Vt. nuke plant closes after radioactive water leak. Neighbors report six-foot frogs outside their homes.

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Independent Panel May Blame BP

Independent panel to share findings on Gulf spill. Many think they will blame BP but that's just a guess.

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

GOP Repairing Image

Victorious GOP sets out to repair image! Look for a much slimmer elephant in the room.

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Victorious GOP To Repair Image

Victorious GOP sets out to repair image. "No more Big Government no matter what!"

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

But We Gave Them A Proper Thrashing

Pentagon chiefs: Afghans can manage by 2014. That's when we leave and Taliban return.

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Broadband Growing #2

Broadband usage growing even as gaps persist, although men say they expected more broads.

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Broadband Growing

Broadband usage growing even as ..............gaps persist!

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Nuke Plant Leak #2

Vt. nuke plant closes after radioactive water leak. Citizens nearby notice they could see their pee in the dark!

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Nuke Plant Leak

Vt. nuke plant closes after radioactive water leak. Fish walking out of the water.

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Just Needs A Good Shaking

Italy: More building collapses at Pompeii possible. Leaning Tower of Pisa included also.

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

"Indefinitely" Apparently Meant 2 Days!

Keith Olbermann returns to MSNBC on Tuesday. Of course, no one will believe a word he says but most didn't anyway.

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Olbermann Back At PMSNBC

Keith Olbermann returns to MSNBC on Tuesday. "Permanent" changed to two days so do anything you like.

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Banks Homeless Also

Homeowners say loan modifications led them to foreclosure. "I hope they lose their bank", say many.

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Kept Changing Us Around

Homeowners say loan modifications led them to foreclosure. "Offered lower payments, longer terms, then raised them!

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Get You A Following & Write Yourself In!

Republican Sen. Lisa Murkowski is on the cusp of vindication after waging a high stakes - and long shot - write-in campaign to keep her job. Many expected to write in their own names in 2012.

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Write-In Wins Senate

Republican Sen. Lisa Murkowski is on the cusp of vindication after waging a high stakes - and long shot - write-in campaign to keep her job. "See. Never give up on Mickey Mouse & Santa Claus!"

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Obama The Politician

Obama supports India on UN Security Council! May make that offer to everyone on this trip.

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Obama Making Promises

Obama supports India on UN Security Council. Pakistan: Thanks a lot, Traitor! Obama supports Pakistan on UN Security Council!

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

David Cameron buzzes ahead with plan

David Cameron has gone ahead with his controversial plan to cut benefits. When asked what's next, he said, "state pensions, the NHS and coke," whilst trying to clear his nose.

written by Julian Shure, 08 November 2010
Rating:

George W. Bush Presidential Library to be a Bookmobile instead

On a media blitz to promote his new memoir 'Decision Points', Mr. Bush announced that his new library will in fact be a bookmobile for children. 'My Pet Goat' will be included in the collection.

written by Juvenal Delinquent, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Theme From 'Been'

Michael Jackson's family still say that is not him on new album release. "Michael never sung no tune from a movie called "Been!"

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Nobel Peace Prize Given to BP

BP was given the Nobel Peace Prize today for its leaking oil rig in the Gulf of Mexico. The event created unity in people's hatred of BP and therefore forced the company to face its own problems...

written by Jean Le Fete, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Heather Retains Sense Of Humor

Paul McCartney's ex-wife Heather Mills says she's not a gold digger. "I'm a pirate. I took Paul's bounty. See my wooden leg!"

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Driving In Your Sleep?

Study shows that you can take a sleeping pill and still get up in your sleep and drive away somewhere in the middle of the night. Actually only one person said that...to his wife.

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
Rating:

Pelosi Won't Leave

As you know, Democratic speaker of the house, Nancy Pelosi is now leaving that position and she wants to be the Minority Leader of the House. "I can still tell a Bush joke with the best of them!"

written by Bureau, 08 November 2010
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