Order by:
Rating:

Andy Murray in tears after Grand Slam

Brutal Roger leaves him red and weeping after 2 hours of punishment.

written by Bill Licks, 31 January 2010
Rating:

French President Sarkozy says "Bank System Operates Without Morals"

Since when has money lending ever had any?

written by Richard DagNabbit, 31 January 2010
Rating:

How To Be Politically Correct 3

Do not say "Spaceman."

Say "Explorer of the Void Between Planets."

written by Xinix Xaxx, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Robin Williams helps out

To make two hundred wigs for children with cancer, Robin Williams is planning to shave his arms.

written by Xinix Xaxx, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Mr Spock a wingeing wastrel?

Leonard Nimoy = No Idly Moaner

written by queen mudder, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Mr Spock a spacious earthworm?

Leonard Nimoy = Roomy Annelid

written by queen mudder, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Mr Spock a spacious earthworm?

Leponard Nimoy = Roomy Annelid

written by queen mudder, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Mr Spock slaving away to pay the alimony checks?

Leonard Nimoy = Alimony Drone

written by queen mudder, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Mr Spock spying for the vegans?

Leonard Nimoy = Non-dairy Mole

written by queen mudder, 31 January 2010
Rating:

French OK Burqa Ban

Suddenly the identities of 5,000,000 aliens will be known to all.

written by Richard DagNabbit, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Ivana Trump shaggin' some critter?

Ivana Trump = Up a Varmint

written by queen mudder, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Nancy Pelosi haemorrhoids abyss?

Nancy Pelosi = Canyon Plies

written by queen mudder, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Nancy Pelosi's hooter a bit rubbery?

Nancy Pelosi = Nose Pliancy

written by queen mudder, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Nancy Pelosi a cunning bitch?

Nancy Pelosi = Canine Ploys

written by queen mudder, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Posh Spice fated to sing?

Victoria Beckham = Karma Bitch Voice

written by queen mudder, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Posh Spice part of dumb, greedy gangsters?

Victoria Beckham = Thick Mob Avarice

written by queen mudder, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Victoria Beckham living in sin with that Top Gun pilot?

Victoria Beckham = Cohabit Maverick

written by queen mudder, 31 January 2010
Rating:

China Threatens "NO More Cheap Tires for U.S." over Taiwan Arms Deal

With a Chinese tread wear warranty of two months, who cares?

written by Richard DagNabbit, 31 January 2010
Rating:

O'Bomba Administration: Stimulus Pays for 600,000 Jobs

Sure enough. However, those are new federal Government jobs, the most expensive form of welfare.

written by Richard DagNabbit, 31 January 2010
Rating:

When Owning a Home Doesn't Pay

Anytime and All the Time in the U.S.

written by Richard DagNabbit, 31 January 2010
Rating:

NKorea Accuses SKorea, US

North Korea accuses South Korea and the United States of planting huge magnet in the ocean off the coast that brings down all their missiles.

written by Bureau, 31 January 2010
Rating:

NKorea To Unload Weapons

North Korea agrees to give up it's nuclear weapons. Will fire them south tomorrow. South Korea not worried as they will all land in the ocean.

written by Bureau, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Joe Biden Tapped to Replace Conan O'Brien on Late Night!

The Vice Presidential Punster said he was flattered at the offer, but said he'd rather hang around the White House relaxing and be where no one dared say anything when he passed gas at either end.

written by Morse, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Arkansas Not Eligible for TARP Funds!

Efforts underway, however, to cover state WITH a tarp in order to hide it from Google Earth and further embarrassment to US from other countries who already think US is nation of PIGS!

written by Morse, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Abel Rodriquez Credited with Efforts to Clean up Arkansas!

Famous Chupacabra Whisperer and Breeder released a pack of his predators on the state's borders:" feelthy pigs be gone by manana-Hasta La Hogs!" Awarded with ultimate gift: governor's daughter.

written by Morse, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Obama Admits He's Bored with Job, Rather be Basketball Play by Play Announcer!

He also admitted he'd like to get 'a lot more nookie' and not be under a microscope. 'A Brother got to be able to run off and get a little onst in a while," he lamented while sitting in on ESPN set.

written by Morse, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Doctors Skirt Airlift Logjam to Save Haitian Children

U.S. children in need get O'Bomba care.

written by Richard DagNabbit, 31 January 2010
Rating:

New Reports Surface on Gordon Brown's Vision!

Insiders say condition is worsening. Reports say he is 'lashing out blindly."
Toll, 2 Aides in hospital, 3 clerk typists afraid to come to work after being yanked from their seats by their neck.

written by Morse, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Arkansas Plans #45

Arkansas Announces Plans To Clean Up State For Tourism: "Join us in getting Bill Clinton back in the White House. At least there were 'jobs' available then."

written by Bureau, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Pelosi Claims 'Wet Spot' on her Seat at State of Union "Wasn't Mine!"

Viewers noticed everytime Barry used the word 'I', Pelosi exploded in her seat.
Still flushed and week kneed after the speech, Pelosi blamed her 'condition' on a weak spring in the cushion,132 times.

written by Morse, 31 January 2010
Rating:

President's Speech

Deficit will climb to $1.3 trillion, says President Obama in last week's speech to the nation. "Now comes the bad news..."

written by Bureau, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Arkansas Plans #44

Arkansas Announces Plans To Clean Up State For Tourism: By next Spring, you must rotate the blocks under every vehicle.

written by Bureau, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Some Habits from Arkansas Hard to Break says Hillary

Claims covering her self with Crisco and running around on all fours being chased by Bill soon wore her out. "Letting him win those greased pig contests was good for his ego but bad for my knees!"

written by Morse, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Cub Scouts Next?

If war breaks out in Yemen, U.S. Military says it may have to call up Senior Boy Scouts. Message goes out: Be Prepared".

written by Bureau, 31 January 2010
Rating:

For All You Movie Connoisseurs out There...

Did you know who that the movie "Constipated" never came out.

written by IN SEINE, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Arkansas Snippet Fiends Surrounded By State Troopers

Illinois State Troopers surround Moorview Institute in Springfield Illinois. Da J-Man shouts: "Come and get me copper!"

written by Skoob1999, 31 January 2010
Rating:

"Arkansas" Now Most Googled State in Union!

Despite interest, most visitors to the site say "I certainly wouldn't want to live there!" Most say interest is 'morbid curiosity' and liken it to wanting to watch 'nude mud wrestling to the death!.

written by Morse, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Obama Concedes College Grades Were Due to Perfect Attendance!

Former Professors acknowledge liberal bent and political pressure for always giving Barry Straight A's. "The fact he was always "Present" proved affirmative action really works", said Harvard Dean.

written by Morse, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Obama Appears to Be Inclined More Toward Center

President's tailor says he convinced Barry to start 'dressing right' so inseams on both legs could be hemmed at the same length. Big balls still causing problem in popularity polls and with zipper.

written by Morse, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Cheech and Chong's "Pot King" Marijuana Super Store Opens in California

The Oakland based Pot, Hashish and Hash Oil cafeteria style Super Store is expected to require all employees to at least start their shifts with their minds on the ground.

written by Richard DagNabbit, 31 January 2010
Rating:

International Flight Diverted becasue of "Person of Interest" on Board

Reportedly, the "person of interest" was a mistress of a U.S. Senator heading for the presses.

Public "Confidence" could have been jeopardized!.

written by Richard DagNabbit, 31 January 2010
Rating:

How to be Politically Correct

Don't say "Redneck."

Say "Colourfully-throated."

written by Xinix Xaxx, 31 January 2010
Rating:

How to be politically correct

Don't say "Enemy Combatant."

Say "Less Than Friendly Individual."

written by Xinix Xaxx, 31 January 2010
Rating:

British Hostages: We're Being Badly Treated

All they feed us is American Fast Food.

written by Richard DagNabbit, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Time: Are the Bible's Stories Actually True?

Of course! Archeologists will probably find Noah's Arc any day now near a petrified Garden of Eden.

written by Richard DagNabbit, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Time Magazine: Is Football Just Too Dangerous?

Gee, I don't know, perhaps we should ask the European Soccer players if more pads are in order.

written by Richard DagNabbit, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Obama views American blue-collar workers

with an abstract curiousity. Hence Obama's failures to live up to his promises to workers in Ohio - a state that will 'reward' Obama come November 2010.

written by Tcoah, 31 January 2010
Rating:

If u think

Obama is for fulfilling American dreams - ask NASA's moon shot team.

written by Tcoah, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Obama is to ideology as

cookies are to milk, and how MA/VA/NJ was to Obama's dream of one-party domination

written by Tcoah, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Smuggling Haitian Kids to U.S. is New Ilegal Boom Trade

Don't we have enough kids of our own already?

written by Richard DagNabbit, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Non-ideologues v. President Obama ->

"Start your engines" - "It's going to be a bumpy ride."

written by Tcoah, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Arkansas Plans #43

Arkansas Announces Plans To Clean Up State For Tourism: Remember to kill and hang your hog/deer/cow up in the BACK yard.

written by Bureau, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Arkansas Plans #42

Arkansas Announces Plans To Clean Up State For Tourism: State police orders lawns mowed. "Remember, that's where two missing cars and seven missing dwarf ornaments showed up two years ago."

written by Bureau, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Cameron promises 'no swingeing cuts' in first year of Tory Government

But he can't promise there won't be any whinging cu*ts in first year of Tory Government.

written by Bill Licks, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Arkansas Plans #41

Arkansas Announces Plans To Clean Up State For Tourism: Right after Governor gets his new free Genitalia Coffee he sent for in the mail, so he can host guests. They sent the wrong 'thing' last time.

written by Bureau, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Yuban Still Alive

Saddam's other son, little-known Yuban Hussein given a safe haven by Columbian Coffee Growers Association.

written by Bureau, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Hit head On The Way Back Down

This just in: Al Qaida #4 had been killed by gunfire of those celebrating the fact that Al-Qaida #3 is still alive.

written by Bureau, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Libby Drew Short Straw

Prison mates say that Scooter Libby showed them all the short straw he drew among White House personnel.

written by Bureau, 31 January 2010
Rating:

US Changes Strategy

US mat send in trained chimps with drone weapons in gorilla warfare with Taliban.

written by Bureau, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Obama Reaches 42nd Channel

President Obama to appear on the Cartoon Channel this week. That makes 42 different channels in the first year. He'll be 'Old Weird Harold's" brother on Cosby Cartoons.

written by Bureau, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Forest Lawn Up 5% Today

With Boomers hitting their 60's in pretty bad shape, Wall Street recommends purchasing Mortuary stocks.

written by Bureau, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Biden Bored

Vice President Joe Biden, saying he feels lonesome hiding in secret bunker, builds on two guest rooms and a wet bar.

written by Bureau, 31 January 2010
Rating:

"Howdo Partner!"

Iraqi who turned in Saddam Hussein' hiding place seen visiting the Bush family in Dallas once again.

written by Bureau, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Bridge in Manchester Collapses

After learning of his ex fiances affair with John Terry, Wayne goes on a bender and passes out.

written by Bill Licks, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Company Plans To Lower White's Wages For Equality

Ethnic minority staff paid 1.00033% less than white workers at Trevor Phillips' equality watchdog.

written by Bureau, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Bullseye!

Pakistani Taliban leader 'killed in U.S. missile strike' as witness says it caught him squarely between the cheeks as he bent over gathering firewood.

written by Bureau, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Likes The Drinks A Bit Also

'Infatuated' South Korean businessman facing five years in jail and deportation for obsession with barmaid, bar.

written by Bureau, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Taxi! I Need To Go To Paris

Parliamentary watchdog chief 'claimed £16,000 from the taxpayer for cab fares' Browm names new watchdog chief overseer.

written by Bureau, 31 January 2010
Rating:

British Godfather In Charge

British Godfather 'threatened enemies from on Facebook from maximum security jail'. 10,000 others apply for 'friends' status.

written by Bureau, 31 January 2010
Rating:

New Terrorist Tactics

Terrorists 'plan attack on Britain with bombs INSIDE their bodies' to foil new airport scanners. Thick walled trampoline tests may be constructed.

written by Bureau, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Bad Mannered

Angry Gordon Brown 'hit out at aide, farted in critics face and yanked secretary from her chair': Sensational claims in new book rock No10.

written by Bureau, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Mickelson Says He's Not Cheating

Mickelson not taking "cheating" accusation lightly. "Tiger really does need help."

written by Bureau, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Carnival/Super Bowl News

N'Orleans Carnival parades adjust for Super Bowl. "We'll try to keep the Carnival noise down as much as we can", vows director.

written by Bureau, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Sport Head Injuries

All clear? Head injuries get attention from states. "Hey, you big guys with no necks, did you hear this?"

written by Bureau, 31 January 2010
Rating:

New Morning-After Pill

New morning-after pill works for up to 5 lays...that should be, "Five Days".

written by Bureau, 31 January 2010
Rating:

iPad Jokes

Shiny gadget, icky name: iPad jokes fly on Web, second only to TheSpoof Arkansas snippets.

written by Bureau, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Nintendo Unimpressed

Nintendo chief unimpressed with Apple's iPad. "We are not amused."

written by Bureau, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Amazon Profits Up!

Amazon 4Q profit climbs 71 pct on strong holidays, especially Kwanzaa!

written by Bureau, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Hilary buys birthday card in Clintons

Hilary Clinton was in London today and was seen in card shop Clinton's. She is also the mystery buyer of Churchill's unfinished cigar which she will ad to her collection including husband bill's cigar

written by SPECTRUM, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Good Bumper Sticker

Study: Distracted driving laws don't stop crashes. Distracted drivers cause crashes!

written by Bureau, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Too Late For That

Davos forum considers world economy on last day. Conclusion: No use worrying now, if the last day is here.

written by Bureau, 31 January 2010
Rating:

No Big Thing

UN climate chief plays down scandals, lies, misinformation, faked movies and goofy Michael Moore, Al Gore.

written by Bureau, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Help On The Way

AP Sources: Govt blesses Toyota gas pedal fix. Applying the glue-remover from bottom of pedals shouldn't take long.

written by Bureau, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Obama Offers Sympathy

Obama taking populist tone in fight over jobs. "I feel your pain. I'm about to lose my job too."

written by Bureau, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Just Bring The Money!

Obama seeks $200M to help cities host 9/11 trials. Cub Corner in Bear Wallow, Kentucky volunteers.

written by Bureau, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Snow A Mess

Snow storm that covered South heads off to sea, as some US Navy vessels get up to a foot of new snow.

written by Bureau, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Men Excluded

Haiti workers hand out 'women-only' aid coupons for feminine napkins.

written by Bureau, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Afghan Appeals To Taliban

Afghan leader appeals to Taliban to lay down guns, rocket launchers, missiles and nuclear weapons.

written by Bureau, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Obama Pushing Nuclear Plants

Obama pushes nuclear energy to boost climate bill, would change most of Bush Nucklar plants by 2011.

written by Bureau, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Super Bowl Coming Up

WHO urging public to have homes tested for radon, help finding drunken and missing Peter Townsend.

written by Bureau, 31 January 2010
Rating:

10,000 Fans Greet Cast of 'Lost'

More than 10,000 fans greeted the cast of "Lost" on Waikiki Beach and were treated to a special screening of upcoming season premiere. Then have trouble finding their way back home.

written by Bureau, 31 January 2010
Rating:

New Miss America

22-year-old goes from Miss Watermelon Seed Spitting Festival to Miss Virginia to Miss America

written by Bureau, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Federer Reigns, Prolongs Drought

Federer reigns after winning 16th major, prolongs British drought

written by Bureau, 31 January 2010
Rating:

A Different War

US Marines facing a 'different war' in Afghanistan. Mainly the presence of terrorists from a dozen other countries.

written by Bureau, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Cut-Up Rip Torn Arrested

Actor Elmore "Rip" Torn has been charged with breaking into a Connecticut bank and carrying a loaded handgun while intoxicated. Then making jokes on the street while throwing money into the air.

written by Bureau, 31 January 2010
Rating:

All Our Allies In Persian Gulf

US upgrades defense of Persian Gulf allies...the United Arab Emirates.

written by Bureau, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Bailouts Hurt System?

Watchdog: Bailouts created more risk in system. But Watchcat group recommends ignoring the whole thing.

written by Bureau, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Baptists Attack Haiti

A group of 10 American Baptists were being held in the Haitian capital Sunday after trying to take 33 children out of country, actually feeding & clothing the poor little ones.

written by Bureau, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Taliban Chief Dead?

Pakistan checks reported death of Taliban chief. Report that he's still moving a little bit.

written by Bureau, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Shakespeare proves money is "much ado about nothing" he's dead!

US lottery winner Mr.Shakespeare has proven The Baird right, money is "much ado about nothing" and is found murdered. Macbeth in Florida, tragic end, warning all multi millionaires, read Shakespeare!

written by Jaggedone, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Arizona Police find Hundreds of Pounds of Marijuana in Septic Tank Truck

Truck owner claims he needed it as a deodorizer.

written by Gail Farrelly, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Obama Meets with Republicans and Chides Them for Being too Partisan

Republicans listen politely, then chant in unison, "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but names will never hurt me."

written by Gail Farrelly, 31 January 2010
Rating:

John Edwards and Tiger Woods to Team Up for New Consulting Firm

"SexMasters, LLC" Where Tiger will provide expert information on the finer points of shankster girl kinky sex STD's while John advises on the best way to destroy your family AND your career.

written by Richard DagNabbit, 31 January 2010
Rating:

O'Bomba Prepares for Exit by Becoming College Hoops Analyst

According to experts, he has the "in and out" call down pat.

written by Richard DagNabbit, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Why Taliban Fighters Can't Be Bought Off

They aren't American Fighters.

written by Richard DagNabbit, 31 January 2010
Rating:

O'Bomba Learns the Lessons of Clinton

Specifically, the Lady Runs the House.

written by Richard DagNabbit, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Passenger Catches TSA Police Asleep at Work wit Video

Military Tribunal and Summarial Execution to Follow

For the passenger, that is.

written by Richard DagNabbit, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Wounded Leno Says "I'm Sorry for BF'n Conan...

It wasn't just a "BF'n" Jay it was a Power Bf'n

written by Richard DagNabbit, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Backpeddling; O'Bomba Says "Deficit" will Prevent Recovery

Now that an excuse card has been tendered, here is a response:
Go to the Banker boys sell them back their worthless salami slices and level up the deficit.

written by Richard DagNabbit, 31 January 2010
Rating:

O'Bomba Rail Project Could Have Job Creation Legacy

Corruption and Bribes Legacy More likely.

written by Richard DagNabbit, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Rip Torn Arrested for Burlarizing Bank

Says Madonna put him up to it after a torrid night together.

written by Richard DagNabbit, 31 January 2010
Rating:

New O'Bomba State of the Union Speech Plan Being Developed

The New Plan is to have music playing in the background as O'Bomba speaks. First up is "I Never Promised You a Rose Garden"

written by Richard DagNabbit, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Ms. Virginia Bends Over, Wins Ms. American Bendover Crown

Wearing a custom Britney Spears Outfit, Ms. Virginia WOW'ed them with a sight spectacular, propelling her to victory.

written by Richard DagNabbit, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Amazon Implements New Book Burning Policy

If they can't make their mark, the books burn. Burn, Baby Burn.

written by Richard DagNabbit, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Arkansas Plans #40

Arkansas Announces Plans To Clean Up State For Tourism; "You don't have to be crazy to work here, but...actually, come to think of it..."

written by Bureau, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Arkansas Plans #39

Arkansas Announces Plans To Clean Up State For Tourism: "Home of the world's only hog-busting rodeo!"

written by Bureau, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Arkansas Plans #38

Arkansas Announces Plans To Clean Up State For Tourism: "Come for the hawg-calling contest, stay for the incest!"

written by Bureau, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Arkansas Plans #37

Arkansas Announces Plans To Clean Up State For Tourism: Now 99 and 44/100th Clinton Free!

written by Bureau, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Arkansas Plans #36

Arkansas Announces Plans To Clean Up State For Tourism: "Got Teeth?"

written by Bureau, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Arkansas Plans #35

Arkansas Announces Plans To Clean Up State For Tourism: "Bring your children here and we'll learn 'em"

written by Bureau, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Arkansas Plans #34

Arkansas Announces Plans To Clean Up State For Tourism: Where every single day it's a "a fine how-do-you-do!"

written by Bureau, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Arkansas Plans #33

Arkansas Announces Plans To Clean Up State For Tourism: "Where we never dispose of our douche, but recycle it."

written by Bureau, 31 January 2010
Rating:

911 Trials Location Now Determined

To be Held in Backyard of Donald Rumsfeld. Donald to carry out sentences immediately thereon.

written by Richard DagNabbit, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Gates Makes $ 10 B in Vaccine Pledge

The dangerous disease immunization program will be administered with pre-loaded syringes that come free in all Microsoft Seven Operating System Packages.

written by Richard DagNabbit, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Taylor Swift Sets New Record

Weighing in at a trim 78lbs. beats all others for Music Industry's "Nothing from Nothing Leaves Nothing" Award.

written by Richard DagNabbit, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Scott McCarron Accuses Phil Mickelson of Cheating with Old Clubs

But acknowledges if Tiger used the same clubs it wouldn't be cheating.

Can somebody please ring up ol' Tiger and tell him "its OK now?"....and hurry up about it.

written by Richard DagNabbit, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Policital Correctness at it again

In New York City, the access ways to the sewers in the streets will now be called "People-holes" and be covered with "person-hole covers"

written by Xinix Xaxx, 31 January 2010
Rating:

U.S. Speeds Arms Build Up in Gulf

Another Invasion & Occupation Opportunity Awaits. Bush & Blair to be Reactivated

written by Richard DagNabbit, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Wanted: Plumber's Assistant

No experience needed. Must be willing to learn. Ass-crack revealing pants provided.

written by Xinix Xaxx, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Used Oats and Health Care Reform

Advertising TV Hucksters, try to sell tampons during the dinner hour. Democratic left wing TV political hucksters, try to sell the same old used oats about health care reform during the news hour!

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Printing Press Manufactures Association Award

The PPMA has awarded President Obama, HS Pelosi and SML Reid their prestigious "Red-Ink" award. PPMA wants to thank them for all the hardware bought by the FED and the US Mint this year.

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 31 January 2010
Rating:

New Jobs?

House Speaker Pelosi has a proposed 3000 page bill that will establish a $2.0 trillion Gas Pedal Inspection Agency (GPIA), as part of the president's jobs creation program!

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Green Power Generation

Scientists have discovered that when 150 million Americans yell at Obama, Pelosi and Reid appearing on their TV sets, there is enough sonic energy generated to power the 150 million TV sets.

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Change we can See

Democratic President Obama laid out his ten month plan to a Republicans Caucus on how to unseat Empress Pelosi in the fall elections. Both parties can then move ahead and do the people's business.

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Bad Air?

Osama bin Laden blames the USA for global bad air. All this time 300 million Americans have blamed it on Osama, for not taking a bath in nine years of living in a cave.

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 31 January 2010
Rating:

A Sign of the Times

President Truman had a sign on his desk that read "The Buck Stops Here!" President Obama has a sign on his desk that reads "President George W Bush did it!"

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Voo Doo Doll Sighting

The Reverend Pat Robertson has been seen sticking pins into a Voo Doo doll that resembles far left wing Democratic House Speaker Pelosi.

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Touchy Political Subject

Raising the subject of Gays in the Military during the US State of the Union address, President Obama threw a boner to his far left wing Democratic supporters.

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Rowing Backwards

President Obama rows backwards about his Supreme Court prognostications. House Speaker Pelosi rows backwards about her health care prognostications. Anyone know any synonyms for rowing backwards?

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Presidential Conundrum

President Obama wants to double the USA's exports in the next 5 years. China, Germany and the UK want the USA to double imports from their countries in the next 5 years.


written by Philbert of Macadamia, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Podex Society Relocates to California

The "Podex" Society has relocated to San Francisco CA from Blue Ball PA. Members realized that Amish Country was the wrong place for their activities. The new venue is expected to work out in the end.

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Just Kidding, Maybe

PERSON 1: Please say something good about Arkansas! PERSON 2: President William Jefferson Clinton. PERSON 1: Oops!

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Gotcha Hugo!

A new type of security scanner was used by the Secret Service during the US State of The Union Address. It showed that Democratic House Speaker Pelosi was really Hugo Chavez with a boob job!

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 31 January 2010
Rating:

Chinese Land on Mars

YIN: We are the first two astronauts to land on Mars, where are the Americans? YANG: Building railroad passenger trains that no one can afford or wants to ride.

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 31 January 2010
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