Order by:
Rating:

Palin Anger Putin

Sarah Palin angers Russia's Putin by saying that, in contrast where she could see someone who peed in Russia at her house in Alaska, it took high-powered binoculars to see Putin's penis.

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Spoof Writer Bureau Pens His 10,000th Snippet

I'll bet this one slipped through so fast between the rest of his that you never notice.

written by Jalapenoman, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Romo Says Critics Are Not Affecting His Performance

"I'll suck on Sundays regardless of what people think of me."

written by Jalapenoman, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Miley Cyrus quits use of Twitter

"i done got tired of all y'all makin fun uh my spellen an such"

written by Jalapenoman, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Sport's Illustrated Swimsuit Model Says "Topless Blondes Have More Fun."

I wonder if she's ever tried it bottomless?

written by Jalapenoman, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Motor oil company approaces David Letterman to be new commercial spokesman

"He's just another man who was caught thinkin' with his dipstick!"

written by Jalapenoman, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Bristol Palin's Ex Boyfirend does "full monty" in women's magazine

Fortunately, the centerfold staple was big enough to hide his shortcomings.

written by Jalapenoman, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Monica Lewinsky issues new press release

"I never worked for David Letterman."

written by Jalapenoman, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Roman Polanski asks questions from European Prison

"If I do get extradited back to California, does Disney still have those Mouseketeer girls?"

written by Jalapenoman, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Very small Nigerian tribe reveals that words "Barrack Obama" are in their rare tribal language

It means "incompetent smiling boob" when translated into English.

written by Jalapenoman, 08 October 2009
Rating:

NFL says Brett Favre may have failed drug test after game

League cannot decide whether or not Geritol is a banned substance.

written by Jalapenoman, 08 October 2009
Rating:

"Gone With The Baby Teeth"

Man who worked at Toms Of Maine inventing a new toothpaste that lasted for an entire year, missing.

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Better Than Average

Naked man running around new Yankee stadium on national television and dodging police, guards and other fans achieves 17.14 minutes of national fame.

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

The Good Old Days

Henry Kissinger said to be getting with old friends on the weekends, listening to the old Nixon tapes and get crying drunk.

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Missing Some teeth

Congressmen who spoke out against allowing women on the front lines of the military beaten up by old battle-ax at home.

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Outlaw Chinese Buffets!

People who eat very little to live a lot longer throw their weight politically against having Chinese restaurants in America.

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Intelligence Hires Mathematician!

"Whoopsie daisy!" says General Petraeus, "Intelligence has underestimated the number of Taliban in Afghanistan by 500,000."

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Popeye, Olive Oil Witnesses

FBI announces that they have finally gotten Bluto to confess that it was he who was behind the spinach e.coli scare last year.

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Sounds Like Baby's First Words

The sudden crisis in Kyrgyzstan allows the rest of the world to know that there is actually a country by that name and, locally, drunk at bar wasn't making up a story as he went.

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Cameron says 'I'm up to the test'

"Come on then, ask me a question on anything you like! Sport, General knowledge. Anything. Geography, Films, Music, Homeopathy. Anything at all!

written by Frank Miller, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Ed Balls "Most Teachers Are Nuts Anyway"!

The TeenBuzz created to prevent teenage crime is been used by school kids to drive their teachers nuts! When asked about the threat Ed Balls said "most of our teachers are nuts anyway!"

written by iscrivener, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Noble prize for literature a FIX, Sir Skoobspeare the real winner!

Spoof writers attacked Oslo today and threw everything at Herta Mueller,the false winner! Jaggedone and his fellow nutters feel the "Spoof Bard", Sir Skoobspeare should have scooped the $850.000!

written by Jaggedone, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Old Scrabblehead Scores Again!

Hot date bragged about all during week at work advances as "Advocate" yields the lucky bum 62 more points with a triple word score.

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Order in The Court!

Defying their latest food court order, cheeseburgers arrive with fries on the plate.

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Real Census Takers

Errors by Census Bureau employees may have resulted in 200 people with criminal records being hired to conduct door to door canvassing. "And, your income and where you hide it, please?"

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Recession Bottoming Out

Further evidence points to the recession bottoming out as Fed Chairman, Bernanke says bottoms at WalMart full half-inch bigger than last year.

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Sports Night Fight!

In Butter County, Kentucky Annual High School Sports Night ends with huge fight as star quarterback has his third trophy shove up his ass by little-known broken-nosed Center!

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

See That Kid, He's 70 Years Old

"As The World Turns", now receive all 53 years from episode one on 500 DVD's for only $399.95!

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Obama Meets Those Who Lost Homes

President Barack Obama made it a point to meet with people today that have lost their homes. "Better get us homes or you'll join us in 2012", states spokesperson.

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Arbroath's Got Talent

Arbroath will field the first woman goalie for a top flight football match against Clyde next week. New signing Susan Boyle has ditched her music career in a desperate bid to stay in the public eye.

written by iscrivener, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Holiday Messages From Obama

A new Obama video has been released in which he appears to be dressed like a huge penis. "To all my people who are Islamic freedom fighters in American, Happy Halloweenie!, in Britain, Happy Guy Fux"

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Polar Bears Change Rules

Polar Bear Club decides that no actual polar bears are allowed after this weekend's tragedy.

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Laptop Still There

Different uses for laptop desk at White House for the past three presidents. Currently: laptop computer, former: lapdog, before that: lapdancer.

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Don't Speak Miranda

Pennsylvania courts free 12th prisoner since July 1st who didn't have his rights read to him when arrested. "That's why they call us "The Keystone Cops" state" says attorney.

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Change! Change! Change!

Post-Leaving Troops In Iraq and Afghanistan position comes with spin doctors better prepared this time around.

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Obama Blames Conspiracy

President Obama accuses vast "You Lie!' conspiracy of keeping him from getting health care bill passed.

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Dinosaur prints found in France

They appear to date from the early Jurassic Renaissance period where dinosaurs experimented with vibrant colours and bold shapes.

written by Frank Miller, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Leaf Once Walked The Earth

Footprint of giant three-toed sloth that one day walked the earth apparently only that of decayed leaf.

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

First Electric Car

First electric police car rolls onto Britain's streets and is ran over by a dog.

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Enlarged What?

Transsexual turned down for breast and penis enlargement claims sex discrimination in case that will cost taxpayer thousands.

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Smuggled In Vietnamese

French politician arrested for 'smuggling 16 Vietnamese migrants into Britain'. "I thought he looked a little fat", states official.

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

He's Been Removed

Husband of Prince Charles's florist, once removed, 'killed himself because he thought she would leave him'.





written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Interest Rates Shaking People Up

Interest rates held at hysterical 0.5% low as Bank rejects call to pump more cash into economy!

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Ripley Is Back

One in four people in the world are Muslim, one in foour are Chinese...but very few Chinese are Muslim, Believe It Or Not!

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

"So What Did Poor Polanski Do?"

French minister who demanded Roman Polanski be freed paid for sex with 'young boys' in Thailand, goat in Iraq and tree at Greenpeace rally.

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Fore Goodness Sake

Grandmother killed by golf ball hit by her playing partner, Geraldine Ford.


written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Cameron Makes His Pitch

'My dream for a new Britain': Cameron sets out vision for Tory-led nation as he makes emotional pitch for PM. 'Is for no more SOB's to sit for the British empire!'


written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Come Dancing Slur?

Strictly Come Dancing's Bruce Forsyth: 'It's no worse than calling us Limeys,' as the Old Fart defends Anton Du Beke's 'Paki' slur.

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

So Dad Wants To Jump From Planes?

President Obama discovers video in back of former president Bush desk drawer showing himself running through White House with a pair of scissors in his hands while aids applaud.

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Favre In The Hole!

Minnesota Vikings line keeping rejuvenated Favre upright as added horns on helmets seem to be working out well.

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

It's All In The Game!

Yankees rally past Twins $297,000,000 to $5,300,000 in American League baseball playoff opener.

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

DOT Hires Psychic!

Department of Transportation releases airline delay list for upcoming Holiday season.

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Web Tool Handy

Web tool helps advise when your flu needs a doctor, claims the AFLACK duck!

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Chip Measures Breasts

Chip measures breast estrogen with just a poke. Chip then carted off to jail after posing as a medical doctor.

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

They're Practically Here

Health Secretary Sebelius: Americans should get the flu vaccinations, flu, any day now!

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Concussions Need More Attention

More attention, better treatment needed for concussions. "When they look away while you're trying to talk to them, give them a little head slap", says expert.

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Hair On Back Of Neck Also Rises

Review: Wireless charging lets you cut the cords, but cats and dogs refuse to walk in certain areas of your home.

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Otter Be A Law!

Feds give sea otters habitat protection in Alaska as Limbaugh accuses a few Greenpeace people of secretly adding a little oil on the backs of those in area that was reviewed.

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Some Good News For A Change

NASA downgrades the threat of large asteroid as arriving in 2015, not 2014!

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Japanese' Godzilla Worse Than Obama's Health Care

Big dino prints found in Jurassic park in France. Japanese say they tried to tell the French that he was headed their way.

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

They're Making That Up!

According to Drudge, Cantor to talk over health care policy with Hoyer, and Fiddledick with Penishead, I guess. Who are these people?

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Slight Misunderstanding

Woman found in Fla. home under 8 feet of trash. Tells authorities that when she moved there she was told that trash pick-up day was on Monday, January 5th. "I guess they meant EVERY Monday."

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Lenient Police Officer

South Carolina's governor's driver stopped for speeding, was not ticketed. "It's rough driving all the way from Argentina", states understanding police officer.

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Stumbling Blocks In Afghanistan

UN encounters stumbling blocks in training Afghans. "They somehow manage to get those blocks out there every night", states UN General Bollocks.

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Godzilla Awakened?

New quakes, small tsunami panic Pacific islanders as recent big ones may have awakened Godzilla, says Japan.

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Joe Says No!

Health bill would cost $829B, help cover 94 percent says Obama group but Congressman Joe Wilson says that they lie!

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Mueller Wins Nobel Prize

Herta Mueller wins 2009 Nobel literature prize for book on fall of communism, although US, Briton, others seem to be headed that way.

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

FBI Watching Terror Suspects

AP sources: FBI eyes terror suspect's travel talk. Overheard, "We're going to Disney World!"

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Iran Nuclear Facilities Could Disappear

Israeli foreign minister: No chance for peace deal as long as Israeli continued to be unrecognized by Iran, etc. "Maybe it's time to show them that we do."

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Woodstock's Grandchildren

AP Poll: Third of parents oppose swine flu vaccine. Afraid they'll become policemen in the future.

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

The Longest Dog

North Dokata woman's 7-foot-dong..... dog could be record the holder, say Book of Records people.

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

"They're Flying The French Flag, Can't Hurt Us!"

Somali pirates attack French military flagship and steal over 50,000 French flags. Probable use: Disguise purposes.

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Most Annoying...Whatever!

'Whatever' so totally tops most the annoying word poll, especially "like whatever!" "Obama on TV about health care" most annoying phrase.

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Roller Coaster Mystery

The world's fastest roller in New Jersey park gets trial run by selected enthusiasts, disappears into thin air, comes back empty except every seat full of shit. "No more rides", say park owners.

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Bubble Boy "Out There"

Family in Wyoming come home to their Bubble Boy being missing. "He's probably wandering around Cheyenne drunk again. Never could hold his champaign", says dad.

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Saved By Mama!

A UFO landed in Washington last night near the White House and a little green man asks "Take me to your ladder". Once on the ladder, he looks at Michelle's mother with rolling pin & hurries away.

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Man Loses Toes

Kentucky man who lost his toes while mowing his lawn says "Maybe we did come from monkeys. I walk all leaned forwards and drag my knuckles on the ground.

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

One-Track Mind

Michelle Obama says that if Barack doesn't quit talking about the health care plan in his sleep, she's moving into other room with her mother. "He even sings a little jingle with it."

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
Rating:

Lisa Marie Twins Almost One

Lisa Marie Presley says that her twins are doing fine as they are almost one year old. "Sometimes I can't tell Hunka Hunka from Banana Sandwich if Hunka Hunka wasn't a girl, or is it Banana Sandwich?"

written by Bureau, 08 October 2009
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10th
54
11th
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