Latest Racist
Wendy Richards, famed misery of Eastenders has entered another race row, when she was caught on TV channeling the spirit of Bernard Manning.
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Health and Wellbeing
Join us for a fun and lively yoga class followed by medication. Beginners welcome.
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Scottish Parliament: "Don't class us as monkies!"
The Scottish Government will not intervene over plans for a controversial tree-top adventure course in Glasgow's Pollok Park. They do not wish to appear to the public as being "Out of their tree!"
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In Response to BuckwheatsButt
I suffer from Alzheimers and I would like to point out that another good thing about having Alzheimers is that you get to meet new people every day.
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Most abundant elements
According to NASA research, the 2 most common elements in the universe are hydrogen and stupidity it was announced today.
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In shape for lunch?
Nutritionists have discovered that too many square meals each day can make you well-rounded.
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Where's Sarah Palin From?
Asked where his Republican running mate, Sarah Palin, hails from, Senator John McCain told journalists:
"I don't know. I'll ask her."
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The Route To Relief
Holidaymakers were making their way home by ferry from Cowes to Southampton. As the ferry was leaving the island, it was announced by the captain that they were leaving via the rear end of Cowes.
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Rear Winds
A notice referring to the rear entrance/exit to a shop facing Blackpool Promenade when it was very windy: "The bottom doors have been locked due to strong winds."
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Education Latest
Children starting secondary school in England this week are the first legally required to stay in education until they are 17.
However, those who have dyslexia will have to stay until they are 71.
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Jolie warmed
Angelina Jolie warned to expect a right dressing down from the Advertising Standards Agency after glamourising guns. She has been given a white dressing gown instead.
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Loose lion
Belfast - a lion on the loose has caused concern for local impala . Northern Irish police are trying to establish a tamelion
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