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Rating:

Climate Change Report: "It's getting hot in here, so take off all your clothes".

Top climatologists proceed to do so.

written by Captain Loogie, 07 May 2007
Rating:

Campbell: We won

Fears are growing for the mental health of Lib Dem leader Sir Menzies Campbell after he insisted his party performed 'very, very well' in last week's local elections.

written by Toby Maller, 07 May 2007
Rating:

Italy 'confused' over war

Italy's Prime Minister Romano Prodi has admitted that the intense in-fighting between dozens of groups in Iraq has caused confusion over which fence his country should sit on.

written by Toby Maller, 07 May 2007
Rating:

Kent quake cost $80m

It's been revealed that last week's tremor off the coast of Kent cost the government $80m. Tory leader David Cameron reacted to the news by saying 'what a waste of money - if anything it did more harm than good'.

written by Toby Maller, 07 May 2007
Rating:

Google launches 'google ass wipe'

Internet giant Google has announced an ass wiping service. The new function further strengthens the company's dominance of the online market.

written by Toby Maller, 07 May 2007
Rating:

Boy George: I'm gay

Eighties pop icon Boy George has stunned fans by announcing that he's homosexual. The notorious hard man told music website NME.com that it felt good to finally come out of the closet.

written by Toby Maller, 07 May 2007
Rating:

US to invade Britain

President Bush has vowed to attack Great Britain if Tony Blair steps down next week. Mr Bush made the threat after meeting with Gordon Brown for the first time.

written by Toby Maller, 07 May 2007
Rating:

Redundancies at Tracey Island

International Rescue have announced that they are in consultation with unions over job losses after product development manager Brains left the company to Join Stingray.

written by Toby Maller, 07 May 2007
Rating:

Jamie Foxx to play Hawking

Multi-talented superstar Jamie Foxx is to play Steven Hawking in a film about the astro-physicist's life. Speaking of Hawking, Foxx said: "I truly dig dat spaz".

written by Toby Maller, 07 May 2007
Rating:

Noel Edmonds badly injured in gun battle

Popular TV host Noel Edmonds has been seriously wounded in a shoot-out at his home in Crinkley Bottom. Police want to question a large pink man with yellow spots about the incident.

written by Toby Maller, 07 May 2007
Rating:

Mark Cuban to sell Dirk Nowitsky on Ebay

After their first round playoff loss, Mavericks owner Mark Cuban vowed to sell star forward Dirk Nowitsky to the highest bidder on Ebay. No word yet if there will be a reserve price set for this bidding.

written by kegoguinness, 07 May 2007
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