Houston, TX - NASA scientists are in a frenzy this quiet Sunday morning, about something new appearing in the heavens. The earth now has two suns in the sky--Sol and Nibiru. Millions of people spotted the extra solar disc on Saturday, and NASA can no longer keep it a secret. The head of NASA, Dr. Karl Saygun, gave an impromptu news conference this morning to reporters, including TheSpoof.com.
"We don't know how long Nibiru has been there, maybe it was always there. No one really knows" said Dr. Saygun. The silly astronomer put on his most serious expression, and began to address the gathering.
"We expect the Northern Hemisphere to begin heating up. The hottest time will be June through August. The days will get longer." he said grimly. "Those of you with light-complexioned skin may even get something called a suns-burn." he said melodramatically.
When a reporter from TheSpoof.com questioned Dr. Saygun how this was different from any other Summer, he stiffened and responded sternly:
"Look, I just work here. I'm a government employee. Just as dumb as your average mail man and as indifferent as any postal clerk. How the hell should I know, and why should I care??" he stated, and walked away from the news conference.
Later on, Dr. Saygun attended a special meeting with the president about Global Warming, and how to make Moslem people feel better about themselves. Meanwhile, the mysterious second sun continued to burn in the sky...