Written by IainB
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Friday, 24 December 2010

image for Apple release the iGlove to solve another problem with the iPhone4
Glove + iPhone = misery

In the cold weather, Apple have identified another problem with the iPhone4, they are unusable whilst wearing gloves.

"It's the capacitance of the screen," said chief technical problem solver Ann Droide. "We have tuned it specifically for the human finger. It doesn't recognise a gloved finger as a finger, but instead treats it like your pocket."

This has meant that hundreds of iPhone users have been turning up at accident and emergency with their fingers frozen to an iPhone screen, or with severe cases of frostbite from playing with their iPhones stood at freezing cold bus stops.

Apple, being the caring user loving company that they are, who never rip off their customers, and always ensure that their community are well catered for, have produced a new range of gloves for their users during winter so that they can carry on iPhoning even when it's cold.

"These gloves are highly technical and incredibly stylish," said Droide. "Our users wouldn't accept anything less."

The Spoof got a sneak peek at the gloves. They are available in only one size currently, but Apple believe that this one size will be acceptable to their entire community. The outside is black, scratch resistant leather with a silver Apple logo on the back of the hand and the palm. Inside there is a thermal woollen layer for warmth and the fingers go up to just below the first finger joint.

"This leaves the fingertips free for manipulating the screen," said Droide, putting on a glove to show them off. "We are expecting them to retail at about seventy-five pounds."

On being asked why what basically are fingerless gloves are retailing at seventy five pounds, Droide was happy to answer. "Our users will pay for the little Apple logo. Even thought that will peal off after a couple of weeks."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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