Local man Tim Traveller has formally announced that he has become divorced from reality.
Tim, from Stoke on Trent, said he had sought an annulment from this World after repeated attempts to fit in failed.
"I'm just not cut out for this sort of thing. Life? What's that all about, eh?", said Tim today.
His failure to hold down a job, take after his pet badger or make a meaningful relationship with another human being all lead Tim to his final dramatic decision.
"Money, eh? What's that all about? And trees? What the fuck is a tree? I'm not into all that sort of thing at all. People? Fish fingers? What the fuck are they anyways? No, mate, this reality lark is just not my cup of tea
", he grunted before vanishing into thin air.