Written by Gail Farrelly
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Topics: Twitter, FBI

Monday, 19 November 2012

image for Twitter Birdie Admits Hacking Emails, May Be Recruited by FBI
A Twitter birdie may have to attend a mind-your-own-business workshop.

It's a bird...it's a plane...no, it's a bird all right. One nosy bird, that's for sure.

Last night she finally came clean and admitted that she's been doing much more than delivering tweets. She's been hacking the email of tweeters, claiming that she couldn't help but crave a lot more info than was in those 140-character tweets.

"You really can't blame me," the bird said, explaining the rationale underlying her actions. She continued, "The public is to blame for teasing us with those little bits of information, then trying to slam the door in our faces when we're hungry for more."

The spying birdie revealed that, as she scoured bookstores and the Internet for information on hacking, she kept bumping into FBI agents seeking the same know-how. "Of course they tried to disguise themselves," she said, "but I could spot them in a minute."

Legal experts differ on predictions of the sentence the nosy twitter birdie will receive for her hacking. Some attorneys think she may get off with just a stern warning and perhaps a few hundred hours of community service in the air. Others say she'll definitely be sentenced to attend a series of mind-your-own-business workshops and nosiness management classes.

Should the nosy bird lose her job as a twitter birdie, she plans to apply for a job in the FBI. The agency is presently recruiting, and her qualifications should make her a top candidate.

She's sure she can hack it.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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