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Showing articles written by Gail Farrelly.


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Funny story:  How Did a Piano End up in NYC's East River?

How Did a Piano End up in NYC's East River?

it's sitting pretty, right under the Brooklyn Bridge, but nobody knows how it got there. Speculation is rampant though. Here are a few of the rumors: -- Billy Joel, The Piano Man, put it there to create publicity for his next concert. -- The ghost of Liberace is responsible. He's still looking for a candelabra to complete the picture. -- The piano may be the first piece of a huge or...
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Funny story:  POLAR Vortex In, POLAR Bears Out

POLAR Vortex In, POLAR Bears Out

Polar bears are disgusted. Their lock on the word POLAR has been hijacked. As one of them told Spoof Science & Technology reporter Gail Farrelly, "Once upon a time, when the word POLAR was given in word association tests, 99 out of 100 respondents promptly answered: bear. No more. Now most respondents say Vortex when prompted by the word POLAR. Go figure." The dumb thing, the...
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Funny story:  My Cellphone's Demand: "I Want a Selfie"

My Cellphone's Demand: "I Want a Selfie"

Sam, my cellphone, hadn't been working well lately, and now I know why. Blurred photos and bad connections had become routine. I complained about this in a phone call to my friend the other day. A few minutes later, I got a text message FROM my cellphone. Yep, you read that right. All text messages go through the cellphone of course, but this one was FROM Sam, my cellphone. Here's what...
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Funny story:  Dumpster Diving Is New Way to Get an Emmy Award

Dumpster Diving Is New Way to Get an Emmy Award

Folks in the television industry now recommend this as the BEST way to capture that award. They discovered this after reading an article in the New York Post: Worker Snags an Emmy ... that he found in trash. Forget arm twisting, lobbying, spending tons of money to "buy" votes. Not worth it, those in the know say. After interviewing approximately 100 dumpster divers for Emmys on the st...
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Funny story:  If you Have a Food Allergy, Tell Your Server...Or Not

If you Have a Food Allergy, Tell Your Server...Or Not

Whenever I see the universal sign about food allergies in a restaurant, I'm tempted to add the words "Or Not." You see, here's the thing. When you tell the server, you tell everyone else within hearing distance. And that may not be smart. What if a disgruntled neighbor is sitting nearby? A neighbor who feels you crossed her property line many times without permission while you worked on y...
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Funny story:  Chimps Demand Retirement Party

Chimps Demand Retirement Party

It happened as soon as the National Institutes of Health announced this week that "...310 chimps will be retiring from medical research over the next few years..." One of the chimps said, "Throwing us a party, it's the least they can do, we've put in our time." And the chimps weren't at all shy about exactly what kind of a party it should be. Here are a few of the things they demanded: --...
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Funny story:  Red Panda Explains Timeout from the National Zoo

Red Panda Explains Timeout from the National Zoo

On Monday morning when Rusty, the red panda (he looks sort of like a raccoon) was reported missing, many assumed that he was displeased with his accommodations at the National Zoo in Wash., DC. Not so. To counteract the incorrect assumption, once Rusty was returned to the zoo later in the day, he contacted a reporter at TheSpoof.com, Gail Farrelly (she's an expert in panda parlance), to...
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Funny story:  NY State Unemployment Benefits Collected by Dead People

NY State Unemployment Benefits Collected by Dead People

It's the gift that keeps on giving. Even after death. Word is that officials will be trying to get the money back. Huh? Retrieval from The Great Beyond? Lotsa luck with that one! This situation intrigued reporter Gail Farrelly, so she went to a NYS unemployment benefits office and interviewed applicants waiting in line to see what they thought of this news. Here's what some of them s...
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Funny story:  JFK Airport Security Guards Justify Workday Naps

JFK Airport Security Guards Justify Workday Naps

Confronted with the evidence (photos of napping on the job), the security guards had a variety of responses about their behavior, when interviewed by reporter Gail Farrelly from TheSpoof.com. Here's a sample: -- "I catch a few winks during the slow hours, so that I'm ready to be extra vigilant during the busy ones." -- "Sleeping isn't allowed on the job? Really? I have to check this...
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Funny story:  Yogi Berra and the Pope Chat on Twitter

Yogi Berra and the Pope Chat on Twitter

Breaking News Two of the world's most famous men have just engaged in a Twitter chat. The Spoof is pleased to bring you the text. Pope: Yo, Yogi. Bless you, my son. Yogi: Grazie, Holy Father, but I didn't sneeze. Finally, we can chat. Hard 2 get a conversation going around here. Everybody's talking 2 much. Pope: Si, si, I know what you mean. What are you doing today,...
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Funny story:  Two Americans Will Attend Spoof Christmas Party in the UK

Two Americans Will Attend Spoof Christmas Party in the UK

And they are: Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer and Frosty the Snowman. They've managed to get a few days off from their Christmas duties in order to attend the festivities. And of course Rudolph will provide the air transportation. He's good at that. He'll carry Frosty in a sidecar kind of setup. It's a bit of a pain in the butt, said Rudolph; but, as he points out, "Frosty doesn't exactly ha...
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Funny story:  No  Malarkey, Giant Eyeball Found on Florida Beach!

No Malarkey, Giant Eyeball Found on Florida Beach!

Things will never be the same in Pompano Beach, Florida. Not since a giant blue eyeball was found on the beach there. No definite info yet as to how it got there or who owns it. As news of the eyeball spread, there were a variety of reactions. "I say it belongs to big brother," said a Florida teenager. "He's always watching, y'know." An older lady on the beach was sure the eyebal...
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Funny story:  Prodigal Peacock Brought Back to School in Queens, NY

Prodigal Peacock Brought Back to School in Queens, NY

What's lost is found. Two and a half weeks ago we brought you a spoof story about the peacock on the loose in Queens, NY. Now there's further info. See an article, "Runaway Peacock Finally Captured and Returned to Queens School," on NYPost.com. Yep, the peacock is baaaaaaaaaaack and seems to be ready to create more havoc. The NYPost.com article contains these ominous words: "He has...
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Funny story:  Peacock on the Prowl in Queens, NY

Peacock on the Prowl in Queens, NY

Yep, there he was, strutting around, proud as a ... well, you know. Queens residents weren't pleased. "There goes the neighborhood," one was heard to remark. Apparently the peacock "escaped" from a local high school agricultural program. He makes no apologies for his flight to freedom. A Spoof reporter who knows peacock prose interviewed her subject in a Queens park. She said tha...
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Funny story:  Mermaids Don't Exist? Minnie the Mermaid Begs to Differ

Mermaids Don't Exist? Minnie the Mermaid Begs to Differ

Minnie the Mermaid, in her seaweed bungalow at the bottom of the sea, was shocked to read on NYDailyNews.com on July 3 that she doesn't exist. But there it was! That glaring headline: "Mermaids, like zombies, not real, say govt. experts." She trembled as she drank a glass of sea water and read these words in the article: "The National Ocean Service has declared that the mythical creatures d...
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Funny story:  Spider-Man Ousted from NYC Gym

Spider-Man Ousted from NYC Gym

To many, he's the amazing Spider-Man. But he's not that amazing to the owners of a gym on the upper East side of Manhattan. They had given him a temporary pass to use the gym facilities, but they're not pleased with his behavior. They've confirmed what was only a rumor: that they've turned down Spidey for permanent membership. These are the reasons they gave: -- Spider-Man refuses to us...
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Funny story:  Lost Parakeet Tweets His Home Address, Starts Trend

Lost Parakeet Tweets His Home Address, Starts Trend

No, NOT on Twitter. In person! Here's the scoop. A lost pet parakeet in Japan was recently brought home when he was able to "tell" (well actually tweet) police where he lived. A happy ending! But it turns out that was just the beginning. A Spoof reporter who has recently interviewed (in bird talk, of course!) a group of birds has discovered that the lost parakeet's act has inspired a num...
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Funny story:  NYC St. Patrick's Day Parade Will Star Snakes!

NYC St. Patrick's Day Parade Will Star Snakes!

We're not talking human snakes. There are sure to be some of them in the parade too, but we're talking about snakes of the reptile variety. And they will not only be in the parade, but they'll be honored guests. You may think this is a wee bit strange. It was, after all, St. Patrick who threw the snakes out of Ireland. But hey, times change. Think of it as a sort of reparation for the...
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Funny story:  Kiddie Cappuccinos Sold in Brooklyn; Ho-Hum, Say Kids

Kiddie Cappuccinos Sold in Brooklyn; Ho-Hum, Say Kids

The latest rage in Park Slope Brooklyn is the fake cappuccino, developed to convince toddlers they're getting designer drinks just like the ones adults are ordering up. Yeah, right! A spoof reporter who understands baby talk has conducted interviews with a number of Brooklyn toddlers and has discovered that they are not deceived. Moreover, they are disgusted by the charade. Here's a sample...
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Funny story:  Groundhogs Seek New Careers

Groundhogs Seek New Careers

They've just about had it, with looking for their shadows. "And it's a once-a-year gig," complained a groundhog who wishes to remain anonymous. "What are we supposed to do for the other 364 days of the year?" An informal survey revealed a variety of career paths now followed by the industrious rodents. One groundhog who has recently signed a contract with a famous weight-loss chain, had t...
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Funny story:  Bad Romance: So What's the Skinny?

Bad Romance: So What's the Skinny?

Given the assignment to write about the subject of Bad Romance, spoof reporter Gail Farrelly grabbed her trusty tape recorder and set out to collect the opinions of a number of experts in the field. A meticulous researcher, Farrelly went to the ends of the earth and beyond to get the whole scoop. Here are her findings -- expressed in direct quotes from the interviewees, who were asked: What...
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Funny story:  Ten Comments from Experts about the Possible Ending of the World in 2012

Ten Comments from Experts about the Possible Ending of the World in 2012

What's the skinny on this scary prediction? Here's a sampling of comments: Martha Stewart: "Be prepared. Pack yourself some nice take-out meals that travel REALLY well." Queen Elizabeth II: "I'm not leaving without my tiara, my royal robes, and my purse." Entrepreneur Donald Trump: "I STILL may run for president." Twitter executive: "Send some good-bye tweets, but remembe...
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Breaking News...

John Walsh's PTSD doctor in plagiarism scandal

Army doctor filed the same medical review hundreds of times for soldiers looking to get tax free disability pay!

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