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Showing articles written by Thomas S. Guisto.


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Funny story:  Top Ten Sights and Sounds of the Year 2020

Top Ten Sights and Sounds of the Year 2020

10. DunkinDonuts fined one trillion dollars for serving sugar donuts to the underaged. 9. Washington D.C. Metro system closes until all escalators are repaired. 8. China approves U.S. budget for 2021. 7. Representative Nancy Pelosi still doesn't know what's in Obamacare. 6. U.S. forces the Catholic Church to take-up Sunday collections for Planned Parenthood in order for the Church...
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Funny story:  Are Blondes Dumb?

Are Blondes Dumb?

Question: How many Blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? Answer: Five, one to hold the light bulb and four to spin the ladder around! Recently a friend emailed me several Blonde jokes, including the one above. I first heard this "dumb" joke in the playgrounds of the 1940s, but they weren't Blondes who were spinning the ladder around. Back then the "they" were Americans of certai...
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Funny story:  The White House Papers

The White House Papers

The New York Times recently received the transcript of the latest cabinet meeting at the White House. The Times released the following excerpts of the meeting. President Obama: First I want to open this meeting by thanking Secretary Panetta for killing Awlaki and that other guy. Leon, job well done! (Round of applause from around the table) Secretary Panetta: Thank you, Mr. President.
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Funny story:  All Aboard!

All Aboard!

I got on board the AMTRAK train to New York at New Carrollton as I normally do. Walking down the aisle wheeling my carry-on luggage with one hand and holding my coffee and blueberry Danish in the other, I spotted my old friend Joe. Even though he was wearing Ray Ban sunglasses, there was no mistaking his big, broad smile. Joe and I had spent many hours together on AMTRAK - Joe going to Delaware...
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Funny story:  The Protection for Politicians Philandering with Paramours (PPPP) Act of 2011

The Protection for Politicians Philandering with Paramours (PPPP) Act of 2011

While the nation was focused on the debt ceiling debate, Congress also past the Protection for Politicians Philandering with Paramours (PPPP) Act of 2011. On August 2nd President Obama signed both the Budget Control Act of 2011 (Also know as the Cut, Quibble, and Kick Down the Road Law) and the PPPP Act without much fanfare. Little is known about PPPP, but since philandering is a bipartisan ente...
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Funny story:  The Weiner Diaries

The Weiner Diaries

After Representative Anthony Weiner resigned from Congress a cleaning crew was sent to his office to prepare it for another occupant. One of the cleaners found Mr. Weiner's diaries from 1998 to present. The following are excerpts from the Congressman's diaries: June 11, 1998 - Decided to run for Congress, must find way to relate to the younger voters! January 3, 1999 - First day in Congres...
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Funny story:  UNSAT 2010

UNSAT 2010

Along with the Patient Protection and Affordable Care Act and the Health Care and Education Reconciliation Act that President Obama signed into law on March 23, the President also signed the Universal and Necessary Sexual Addiction Treatment (UNSAT) Act of 2010. Apparently this law was passed during the lunch break the day the Democrats shutdown Congress in order to caucus on health care refo...
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Sherlock Actor Investigates Cast

Benedict Cumberbatch drilled the Star Trek cast and successfully deduced that his stolen peanut butter and jelly sandwich was taken by Zachary Quinto.

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