Jean Le Fete gazed morbidly at the orb as it bounced towards his hotel. He thought fleetingly of jumping out of the window, perhaps he would awaken from this nightmare within a nightmare, within a....the phone rang.
"Meet me at the laundry chute," a familiar sultry voice said, the phone clicked.
"Merde!" he cursed and threw the phone across the room and he cursed at himself for being so weak...
Tatoomein - Today as the double son/daugter rose and got out of bed, siamese twins Luke Pissgum Skywalker and sister Leia Pissgum Skywalker decided to call on their Jedi mentor Yoga.
"Mocked you are, respect you are not, no more you fairest in all the land," chortled Yoga.
"But Yoga," replied Luke, "We defeated Lord Vapor and his merry men in green tights and we even destroyed a Yoko Ono con...
#3 was taken at gun point to a dock in the cavern.
"Odd," she thought to herself, "Isn't this below sea level."
Mark read her thoughts, "Yes it is below sea level my dear, a special lock allows us this docking area."
"But for what ?" she gestured at the water, "there's no boat."
"Ahhhh, but that's where you're mistaken, it is not just a boat, but a submarine, the likes you've never see...
My mind went back to that fateful night when I had follow Carina…#3 into The Spoof inner sanctum. I'd been a fool to follow her, but what man wouldn't have done the same, indeed, everyone in this room, save maybe Charpa had done the same. Now this odyssey, or was it an oddity, had brought us to a writer named Skoob laying on the stage with his feet and hands in the air, running like….a gerbil.
"Have you changed your mind yet?" asked number 3 bemusedly as smoke from the gunpowder began to clear and be replaced by the usual cigarette and banana leaf smoke.
"Just that I think…," he paused, "Why did you purposely miss those three bastards, you don't strike me as missing anything without purpose," said Jean le fete.
"To give you something to write about…if you lived… and you are alive...
Garden City, KS - Dorothy Gail of Kansas turned 89 years old today. (Don't try to tell her she's older! Just a fair warning from one who tried!).
We caught up with Dorothy as she was out walking Toto the XII on a dirt road near her farm on her way to a reunion with other Wizard of Oz characters. "Dorothy how does it feel 71 years later to have returned from a magical world like Oz to our world...
London's underbelly - The smell of rotting bannanas was overwhelming as I came off of the subway in lower Dorchestorshire of Loxley. The fog was relentless as I emerged into the night at 2am. Then I saw her, a red head with the most incredible gams I'd ever seen. She looked me over as if I was a piece of meat, and not a particularly good piece, but maybe I'd do.
"What cat dragged you down...
Hog Jaw, Arkansas - (Where?!?) Hog Jaw, Arkansas - Greetings everyone, we are at the corner of 1st street and Main in Hog Jaw Arkansas, awaiting the motorcade of Zsa Zsa Gabor and her entourage, also her groom, only known in these parts as Charpa. In fact we have a local person here, Finnious McGee, who says he has the low down on Zsa Zsa's groom to be.
"The problem with you Papparazzi's is yo...
Bad Poetry Corner
Twas 2090 and on Mark's deaf bed
Not a brain cell was stirring
His Blackberry was dead;
All the stock in the Spoof was at a $.99
Per share, with no Bad Poetry Corner
The readers didn't care
When up on the roof there arose such a Clatter
Mark sprung from his bed of nails to see
what was the matter
THen what to his dottering eyes should appear but
Fergus McCarth...
I received a telegram whilst in the middle of my breakfast of fried pigs blood, and various minced spices, which we call "larb loo-it" here in the southeast of Thailand.
I was sweating already, but at least it was the pepper not the hot season heat and humidity this early in the day. "What the bloody hell is Erskin up to now I?" I said to no one in-particular except for two gingko lizards and...
Yonkers, New York - After a recent date with his fiance' Paul McCartney stopped in a local Pub for a cold one and The Spoof was there to chat with him.
"Get away mate I'm just here for a beer to wash down me meds, I have like 15 different ones these days," said Paul, "I don't smoke grass anymore, don't want any, run along."
We then showed Paul our official Spoof.com Press ID and he immediate...
UCLA - Britney Spears' vagina revealed today what a typical day is like at UCLA.
Suzanne Pleshette of the former and original Bob Newhart show passed away a couple weeks ago, much to my dismay. I was only boy when she played Bob Newharts wife, but I would have given my right arm to be the one she told to turn out the lights when they went to bed.
Whether Steven Fawcett is ever found, thank you to him for capturing the jaded worlds imagination with his daring adventures. In the spirit of explorers like Jack London, William Perry and countless others, Steven Fawcett is a throw back to those earlier times when men dreamed of new discoveries, new frontiers and pushing the envelope to the unknown.
USA TWODAYS - This article begins special coverage we were afforded by Captain Kirk of the Starship Enterprise. We were beamed up prior to the beaming up of Presidential candidate Ron Paul, so that we might record the interection for USA TWODAYS.
Larry King had his hands full, but he seemed to relish the opportunity to engage with three famous, but troubled starlets.
APE Line - On Larry King live this week, an historic event occurred when former Beatles Paul McCartney, Ringo Starr, and wives of John Lennon and George Harrison, Yoko Ono and Olivia Harrison respectively.
APE MUZik - And now the latest on Paul McCartney's newest release on his new recording label with Starbucky's Hear Music.