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Thursday, 26 May 2011

image for Rush Limbaugh Addresses The Sports Reports That He Is Buying The Minnesota Vikings Limbaugh has denied that there is anything sexual about the fact that he likes to put 12-inch cigars in his mouth.

MINNEAPOLIS - Rush Limbaugh was in town visiting his old friend Governor Tim Pawlenty when he was asked about the sports reports that he is seeking to purchase the NFL's Minnesota Vikings.

El Rusho, took a puff of his 12-inch cigar, and remarked that ever since last year when he tried to buy the St. Louis Rams everyone keeps asking him if he is still looking to buy a professional football team.

Limbaugh told Sports Territory that he is definitely looking to buy an NFL team but that it is certainly not the Minnesota Vikings.

He went on to tell Atwood "Overtime" McSparrow that he has always hated the cold weather and so he would never buy the Vikings for that reason and that reason alone.

Rush quickly added that he would also not even dream of buying the Green Bay Packers, The Buffalo Bills, or the New England Patriots.

Governor Pawlenty asked the GOP mouthpiece if he was prejudiced against teams that reside in the so called cold regions of the country.

Limbaugh giggled like a little St. Paul school girl and replied that he certainly was.

When McSparrow noted that his third wife had said that the real reason he hated the cold was because it tended to cause his already small winky wink (groin gizmo) to become even smaller Limbaugh became very offended and ended the interview.

He stormed out and said that his third wife was a Democrat and that is precisely why he divorced her in the first place. As he was leaving he paused to say that he is sick and tired of hearing that dumb winky wink rumor and he wants for the news media to stop asking him about "Little Rush."

In another news media related story. Sarah Palin reportedly informed her campaign manager that she wants for him to instruct the news media to please refrain from asking her any geographical questions that could make her look like she's kind of on the stupid side...geographically speaking of course.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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