Written by j.w.
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Thursday, 24 February 2011

'I have heard enough of this whining about people being killed in Libya - it is now clear the price of petrol is going up and the economy is going to suffer.'

I have heard enough about people being killed in New Zealand. Now we can expect the price of lamb and kiwis to go through the roof.

I have heard enough about the weather in Australia with people getting flodded and and burnt at the same time. Now we can expect all those excuses for losing the Ashes to come into the arena.

I'm tired of watching TV and seeing more advertising time than time with the programmes. I can't follow the stories anyhow.

There should be an overhaul of the Foreign Office and all the public school gits should be sent to Brazil. I want to see the country back in the hands of people like me.

These are just a few of the eloquent opinions express on BBC FiveLive which I am bringing you today.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!
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