Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Tuesday, 22 February 2011

image for The "Voluptuously Sultry" Cameron Diaz and Her New York Yankees Boyfriend A-Rod Film A Popcorn Commercial A bag of Act IV Popcorn. (From the photo collection of David Crosby).

NEW YORK CITY - Over two billion world wide viewers saw the seductively sexy Cameron Diaz hand-feeding some popcorn to her boyfriend Alex Rodriguez during this years Super Bowl XLV.

Wentworth Goldenbaum, an advertising executive with Act IV Popcorn, stated that he was home watching the game in which the Green Bay Packers defeated the Pittsburgh Steelers 31-25 and suddenly Cameron was shown on the huge TV screen feeding A-Rod some popcorn.

He immediately envisioned the two starring in an Act IV Popcorn television commercial.

Goldenbaum picked up his cell phone and he called up the president of his company and made his commercial advertisement pitch. He said that the president of the company immediately told him to pick up the football and run with it (no pun intended, implied, or otherwise expressed).

Diaz and Rodriguez were contacted the next day and after hearing the fantastic offer from Act IV they instantly agreed to film the commercial.

In the commercial the two are shown walking hand-in-hand on an isolated beach down in Cabo San Lucas, Mexico. It is an extremely hot day. As they walk along the beach, Cameron finds a single bag of Act IV Popcorn sitting in an abandoned rowboat.

She and A-Rod both dream about how fantastic it would be to be able to eat some Act IV Popcorn right now, but of course they are about a mile from the nearest microwave.

Suddenly as the two sit on the beach kissing. A wayward Galapagos turtle happens buy. Cameron and A-Rod look at each other and quickly stand up.

A-Rod places the popcorn bag on the shell of the huge turtle. As the turtle inches along on the hot, scorching beach, the popcorn kernels start to pop and about 2 minutes and 30 seconds later the bag is completely popped.

Cameron takes the bag off the turtle and she opens it. She picks out one of the popped kernels and starts to eat it. She catches herself and then starts to feed it to Alex.

Alex puts his hand in front of his mouth and he motions for her to feed it to the turtle. Cameron smiles, kneels down, and feeds it to the turtle.

The scene then cuts back to A-Rod and Cameron as they are sitting on the shoreline with each one feeding the other one some popcorn.

Suddenly Ted "The Velvet Voice" Williams is heard saying, "Act IV Popcorn - Where there's a will - there's a way."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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