Written by Lady Godiva
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Tags: jeans, stutter

Monday, 21 February 2011

image for Stuttering is in the jeans Be careful what you wear-it could affect your speech

According to recent studies - Stuttering is in the jeans.

The type of stutter, or stammer, is dependent upon which jeans you choose to wear.

For example, if you favour Levi's then you will have a very difficult time getting any word out which begins with 'L'.

You will find yourself speaking thus:

"I l-l-l-l-l-ike you l-l-l-ots. L-l-l-l-et's go out to get a pizza. If that's ok with you L-l-l-inda."

If your jeans of choice are Wranglers, expect to be speaking thus: (even though the W is silent)

"W-w-w-where do you live? Oh! W-w-w-isconsin? W-w-w-what do you do for a living? Oh! You are a w-w-w-w-aitress? I hope I don't sound like a w-w-w-wanker to you. It's these bleeding jeans."

So be careful which jeans you choose to wear!

Morrisons are selling their own brand. Hand made by children aged 6 - 9 from Berwick Hills Middlesbrough, in a factory behind the Berwick Hills branch.

The name chosen for their own brand of jeans is F-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-flipping jeans.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!
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