Written by Charpa93
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Monday, 2 August 2010

image for Who the Hell Needs Two Effin Wedding Gowns?

The groom only wore one tuxedo. Everyone in attendance at the wedding wore only one outfit, with the exception of maybe one or two women bringing a more comfortable pair of shoes to wear during the reception. So it begs the question, why did Chelsea Clinton need two expensive designer wedding dresses to get hitched?

They are both Vera Wangs, so it can't be because one of them is a beautiful one to keep and cherish forever and the other is an off-the-rack sack that can be discarded after Chelsea spills nacho dip and champagne on it and then has it smothered in wedding cake when the happy couple smashes it into each other's faces.

So what is the deal? Since I'm not a regular at extravagant weddings, I'm not privy to protocol. Is this a regular occurrence? I did some checking. Seems it's all the rage these days-that is, all the rage for those who can afford it. Most brides have to stick with just the one dress and then change into street clothes during the reception when it comes time to do some partying.

Thank God Chelsea and her mother had the foresight to ask Vera Wang to design two dresses--one, her dream wedding gown, and the other, her dream wedding gown in a lighter version. Kinda like someone buying the full fat sour cream and then realizing the diet might not allow for all that fat on a regular basis and opts to buy a second carton of low-fat sour cream. Makes sense to me.

So this also begs the question, if two wedding gowns, did Chelsea also have Vera design two sets of sexy lingerie for the big night, i.e. one for the tease and one for the afterglow?

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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