Written by WhoAreYouAll
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Friday, 9 April 2010

A long ass time ago, people were afraid of penises. So afraid of them, that they labeled sex evil and declared condoms immoral.

Since then, a lot of sexual revolutions have passed and people learned that sex is natural. Or so I thought.

A couple of days ago my fundamentalist Christian friend (I don't know why, don't ask) told me that condoms are the most immoral use for rubber. Naturally, I told him I could think of 5 more uses for rubber much more immoral than condoms.

So here it is.

Rubber Dildos - Used to choke prostitutes and to stick it into a woman(or a man pretending to be a woman)'s pooper. Rarely ever fun if you're a straight man. Avoid if drunk.

High End Sex Dolls - Made of rubber, A high end sex doll looks like a woman except it doesn't make you dinner, clean your clothes, or do the laundry.

Flesh Light - Look at High End Sex Dolls.

Giant Latex Sex Costumes - Kinda Self-Explanatory

Rubber Bands - "I use a rubber band on my penis when I have sex. How bad is that?? Does that cause trouble?? What kind???"

So as you see fundamentalist Christians regular sex should be by far the least of your worries.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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