Written by Nae mair crap
Rating:

Share/Bookmark
Print this

Thursday, 18 March 2010

image for David Cameron the candidates debate 20 things he must not say this is my great gran in Canada, looks OK for 95 and still knitting

1 Don't mention Margaret Thatcher

2 Don't mention Nigel Lawson

3 Don't mention Norman "rottweiler" Tebbit

4 Don't admit Maggie raped you when you were 12

5 Don't admit rottweiler held you down while Maggie raped you

6 Don't admit you enjoyed it

7 Don't say, I did not have sex with that woman

8 Don't mention the Common Market

9 Don't admit you know where Europe is

10 Don't mention the economy, stupid

11 Don't say you have no experience of high office

12 Don't admit that have a Scottish sounding name

13 Deny your great grandfathers Scottish birth certificate Brown is waving at you

14 Don't admit that you voted for the war

15 Don't admit that you have shares in armament companies

16 Don't admit that you have no policies

17 Don't admit that you don't know what a policy really is

18 Don't admit you give speeches without notes because you cannot read

19 Don't admit that writing is difficult as well

20 Don't wear your Old Etonian tie or confess that you were Boris Johnsons fag*** at Eton

but I do like my piccy on every page of thespoof.com wheeezeeeeeeeeer
*** look it up on Wikipedia, I can't be arsed explaining

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!
Print this

Share/Bookmark

Go to top ^