Written by Bunsen Burner
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Friday, 16 October 2009

image for Opposites Attract! These two opposites are deeply in love

Are you single? Feeling lonely? Have you tried all the usual dating agencies? Did they fail you? Of course they did. They get you to spend all that time seeking your perfect match. You see profiles which tell you that this one is a 98% match.

No, it just isn't the right way to find a partner. All you are doing is looking for another you. The same likes, the same dislikes. Blah blah blah.

Well now there is Opposites Attracts! We will find you someone completely different. No more boring dates where you just sit there and nod your head at everything they say. Instead there is a real chance of a good old fashioned stand up row. Isn't that what being in a real relationship is about?

Remember, we are all different. Stop looking for yourself. Unless of course onanism is your thing. Get out and meet somebody different with Opposites Attract. For a modest fee of $1million for six months membership we will search high and low for somebody really different.

Remember, it is a scientific fact that opposites attract. Even Paula Abdul agrees!

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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