Written by birbee
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Tags: dating

Wednesday, 22 July 2009

image for The Dating Game #2 If I have to, I have to.............

In the recent magazine article "The Dating Game #1" I promised to you, the loyal listener, that I would join a dating agency, meet women, and relate all my experiences from what happened along the way.

Well I am pleased to be able to tell you that I immediately went off and duly filled out an application form and have been accepted by the rather fetchingly named agency, "Subtle Connections".

Subtle Connections claims to be a Premier Dating Agency, but I hope they are not too frigging subtle because for a fucking £250 sign on fee I want them to shout about me from the bastard rooftops.

Anyway, I filled out the application form and they asked me to describe myself.

According to my description, I am 6'3" tall, physique of an athlete, GSOH, EW, ABS, AWD, AC and loaded.

Not all of that is a lie; I AM 6'3", but the only athlete you could compare me to would be a 1980's darts player, with the dodgy mullet to match.

I'm totally skint and as for the rest, I copied it from an ad in 'Trade It' cause I thought it sounded good.

Well, I can do nothing now except sit back and wait for the postman to empty his sack over my doormat, with details of buxom beauties of course (non of this gay shit, I'm not into that, but each to his (or her) own.)

They had better not send me any mingers, munters or fucking gingers though, or I'll go freaking ape.....

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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