Misspelling Methanol Myths

Funny story written by Aspartame Boy

Saturday, 24 January 2009

image for Misspelling Methanol Myths
Hit me with another shot of methanol

LONDON, England - Defrocked Corporate Priest, Neurela U. Semen, clears up what's healthy and what's not.

"There's so many confusing headlines out there whenever you search the news on aspartame; some say you should be avoiding or afraid of it; it really has mixed up people rather than helped them eat a healthy diet," she said.

Myth: Good foods are healthier than bad foods. According to my brother's science project, this is simply not true. Besides, who is to say what is good? What is bad?

Myth: Methanol causes cancer. That's crap. The stuff kills germs 12 ways.

"Methanol Light certainly can be used, consumed in foods, in moderate amounts," Neurela said.

Myth: Agent Orange is bad. Why would anyone make it if it was bad? Also, how could they SELL it if it was bad? Really, some people are so paranoid.

Myth: gasoline is bad for your stomach. Moderate use of gasoline is actually wise for your stomach.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics

Related Funny Stories…




Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Subscribe…
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more