Written by Scott Nairns
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Monday, 26 May 2008

A 'Queen of the South' versus 'Glasgow Rangers' Cup Final was never going to get the mouth watering.

On a scale from 1 to 10, this match was a clear cut, minus 10!

Saturday morning women's football has more appeal.

In fact it was worse than that, with millions expected to switch over and watch the Michael J Fox film on ITV instead.

For those lucky enough to have kept to tradition, the Cup Final proved to be the funniest in History, EVER!

No set of fans at Hampden could contain their laughter, when eventual Rangers hero Kris Boyd took to the field, sporting a Comedy MOUSTACHE!!!

Some were hailing this as a Walter Smith masterstroke to fool the Doonhamers players into rib-tickling submission, and it had appeared to work when they led 2-0 at the break.

Suddenly, TV, Magazines, Newspapers and even Jongleurs Comedy Club were then scrambling over themselves to report on this game, and the Comedy Genius; Kris Boyd.

This was no longer a boring cliche'd 'David v Goliath', this was all about a new media darling and luvvy, 'Goliath v wee bitter nasty 'David'.

Behind it all though was, yep you guessed it, 'TheSpoof.com' editor Mark Lowton who was whisked from his poolside on Friday and flown in an armoured plated helicopter, to lend his coveted moustache to Boyd.

"I told Krissy to use the funny glasses as well that make you squint eyed, just for that extra comedy effect. That way he really would have played a blinder!, but he stuck to the plan though, and i doubted if he could actually pull it off, but he did!

It's all about making people laugh i suppose, and getting rich is just an added bonus", said Boyds new agent, Mark Lowton.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!
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