Written by NickFun
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Thursday, 6 March 2008

image for Wii SUCKS!!! This woman will probably never play Wii

I must be getting old - that's an expression I've always hated but it seems to be coming true! I played my first Wii game last week. I was dumfounded as to how "real-life" it was! I played Wii golf. It seemed just like real golf but without all that nasty fresh air, exercise and camaraderie.

Also, a simple putt is almost impossible to make using one of those machines. I always putt to hard and the damn ball goes flying off into the rough. It won't let me putt soft! I took my virtual club and hurled it at my teammate. If it had been a real club I would be in jail now for assault.

Next I played Super Mario Galaxy. It's much like the old Super Mario except it's TOTALLY IMPOSSIBLE TO PLAY!!! At least with the old game I could stomp on those "things" once in a while.

I have heard there is also a Wii sex game. I haven't seen it but I suppose it's not much more than a Penthouse magazine and a screen. When they add touch, smell and her screaming my name I may have a look.

Someday we won't need real lives. I hope I don't live that long.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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