Written by John Andreini
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Tags: Beer, Music

Thursday, 29 March 2007

We'd have to listen to Country & Western music

He'd order cheap, watery American beer

He'd flirt with the waitress

The conversation would be all about him

Everything on the menu would be fried

Instead of using his napkin, he'd wipe his mouth with his sleeve

He'd tell filthy jokes with his mouth full of Bar-B-Que ribs

Come on, you know he's an obnoxious drunk, loud and rude

The manager would have to ask him to quiet down

The bill would come and he'd make a big stink about how many drinks he had

He'd stiff the waitress

Patrons would clap as he walked out

He'd insist on driving

He'd throw up on the living room carpet

He'd pass out on the bed next to Laura in his vomit-stained clothes

I'd have to find my own way home

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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