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Sunday, 16 March 2014

image for On A Lighter Note: More People Are Being Cremated Today!

"Lighter note huh? You news people think the whole world is one big happy home don't you? Well, I deal day in and day out with dead people and cleaning them up, placing a cotton ball with alcohol up their wazzoo and draining them dry so what so humorous about that?"

After telling Mr. Clay we only were there to ask him and his staff..

"Did you say 'Stiff'?"

"No. I said staff. The people who work for you."

"Then you were talking about Stiffs (Snort). Not worth a hill of bones if you ask me, but they are paid well for doing things that most don't even want to know about."

For instance?

"People who want their remains scattered but don't want to be cremated! Others asking if they'll wind up in someone's coffee. Nope! It's your own coffin and it is spelled c-o-f-f-i-n, not coffee." (Snort).

Back to our article on cremation, Sir!

"More people are choosing cremation over traditional burial. Nothing wrong with that. Shows they're thinking outside the box!" (Snort. Poot. Snort.)

"Well, we're outa here."

"So are we all...sooner or later!"

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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