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Tuesday, 24 July 2012

image for The footprint elimination extremists The motto of FEG: Live veg, wear veg, vegetate

A group of extreme environ-mentalists have been attempting to promote their frugal lifestyle. The Footprint Elimination Group (FEG) are determined to live their lives making as little impact on the planet as possible.

FEG members eat nothing but lentils and water, and their clothes are made from lentils too. Twenty of them sleep side by side on the floor of an apartment they have rented, which they say is very cost-effective.

"We're trying to minimise our impact on the world," said FEG leader Noah Dea. "Did you know that the average person living today has a total environmental footprint of 3 miles? That's the same as a giant."

The concept of the carbon footprint is widely known, but FEG have also decided to reduce their oxygen footprint by breathing as little as possible. They hope to live their lives without making any impact on the world at all. Once they die it will be as if they never existed.

However, police are said to be investigating the mysterious disappearance of a couple of group members. One man was said to have died of malnutrition and to have been "recycled" by the other members of the group, but they will not speak about it.

"If everyone in the world lived like us," says Noah, "Then you could squeeze another 10 billion people onto the planet."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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