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Monday, 12 March 2012

image for A look at: This week St Barnandbus Hospital Fook Mea and Fook You repair the filling cabinet

Our drama unfolds in the operating theatre of St Barnandbus hospital Epsom. The surgeons are half way through removing Mrs Grongles glasses when the anaesthetist asks how long they will take.

"How dare you Mild" Said Sir Bitter. "This woman deserves our very best attention!"

"Yes Sir!" shouted the Porter.

"What" asked Sir Bitter.

"Sorry sir, I was watching the monitor" answered What.

"What do you want, attention" asked Sir Mild.

"No sir" said Mild.

"I don't need Attention" replied What.

"Yes Sir" repeated Attention.

"This is getting stupid" sighed Nurse Night "can we concentrate on the procedure?"

"Yes, lets" answered Sir Bitter.

Mrs Grongle had her glasses removed and the operation ended without any further drama.

Head cleaner, Madge Floor, mopped the ward without doing under the beds. A hawk eyed Matron watched from her desk and was not pleased. "Mrs Floor, please ensure you do under the beds we have to maintain standards, this is 1950 not 2012!"

"Beg pardon Matron Wax, I didn't want to disturb the patients" replied Mrs Floor.

"No thank you" answered Mr Beg.

"Thank you?" enquired Matron Wax "What for?"

"Did you want me?" asked Mr Thank.

"Matron was speaking to me!" shouted Mr Beg.

"Oh dear Matron Wax" giggled Mrs Floor "It does get confusing".

The Ear Nose and Throat department was very busy the twins had been at the hospital for a short time since emigrating from China they are good at their job and aim to please everyone.

"Miss Fook, can you send in the next patient" asked Doctor Off.

"Did you want me?" enquired Fook Yoo.

"Fook Mea" replied the Doctor.

"Fook Yoo, Doctor Off wants you to get the next patient" said Fook Mea.

"Mrs Funt you can go in now" advised Fook Yoo.

The hospital wheels continue to turn as another patient is given an examination by the kind doctor.
In next week's episode we will be entering the world of the Mortician where Mr Deeth will show us how he lays out a body and searches the cavities for loose change.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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