OH, THANK HEAVEN, NY - 7-Eleven convenience stores were raided across Long island, New Yawk, by the city's finest, accompanied by Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms and Explosives (BATF) agents.
The U. S. government considers alcohol, tobacco, f...
Tuesday, June 18, 2013 - House Republicans today announced their intention to fully support the Freedom From Wages Act.
"This is a very important piece of legislation," said House Majority Leader Eric Cantor (R-Va), "and one that will finally free...
DETROIT - Mick Jagger flew to Detroit to see about a business deal that his guitarist Keith Richards had told him about.
While he was in the Land of The Tigers, Lions, Pistons, and Red Wings, he was asked by Pico de Gallo with Tittle Tattle Tonigh...
HOLLYWOOD - Jane Lynch the star of Glee has just announced that she is divorcing her wife of three years Dr. Lara Embry.
The 52-year-old Lynch told Hollywood Innuendo that there were several very personal reasons for the break up.
Jane said th...
WASHINGTON, DC - An Infernal Revenue Service (IRS) superstar in Washington says she personally examined tea party groups' applications for tax-exempt status without taking action on them for over a year in many cases. "I just never seemed to have the...
President Barack Obama today, in response to criticism he has received about his pending one hundred million dollar trip to Africa, indicated to sources close to him, that he was considering changing the arrangements.
He has tentatively booked a f...
ST. ECLAIR, ILL - Michael Cook, who was caught, white-handed, cooking up smack (or maybe it was coke; details are confused in what remains of his mind), has resigned in disgrace from his position as a Cook County judge.
A colleague died of a heroi...
WASHINGTON, DC - President Barak Obama and his wife, First lady Michelle, are reportedly separating. According to unnameable sources, Mrs. Obama is taking the couple's daughters, Malia, 16, and Natasha (alias Sasha), 11, with her to Martha's Vine...
WHITEWASHington, DC - Under the Obama administration, the ship of state has been likened to the Titanic, and, critics contend, the scandals that have rocked the ship are "just the tip of the iceberg."
"If I didn't know better," a bemused Geor...
NEW YAWK, NEW YAWK - Failed presidential candidate and controversial former secretary of state, Hillary Clinton recently had an employee of Bare It All Glamor Shots fired for having had the "temerity to photograph" her while she was naked.
The emp...
WHITEWASHINGton, DC - The Associated Press (AP) has discovered that President Barack ("Barry") Obummer's, uh, Obama's administration, in the interest of "government transparency," has set up secret offshore email accounts and may be using them to cov...
WASHINGTON, DC - In an off-the-record press conference, President Barak Obama, in the interest of "government transparency," made a startling announcement. "We're coming after you!" he warned the American media.
Although he wouldn't name the names...
DAMASCUS, SYRIA - During the 2012 presidential election, former president Bill Clinton suppressed his true feelings for his wife's arch rival. To project the appearance of political unity within the Democratic Party, Clinton refrained from criticizin...
WASHINGTON DC - Some time after the inauguration of President Obama, George Soros began telling people how satisfying it was to buy the entire US Federal Government. Establishing One-Party-Rule in the 2008 Elections may have cost $5.3 Billion, but So...
NEW YORK CITY - Multi-Billionaire Rupert Murdoch has filed for divorce to rid himself of wife #3 Wendi Deng.
According to Bedroom Pillow Talk, the 82-year-old mogul reportedly got tired of the fact that his wife Wendi has refused to cook his favor...
LOS ANGELES - Well as they say the squeaky wheel gets the grease and in this case all of Lindsay Lohan's four wheels were squeaky.
According to Fajita San Guacamole with Hollywood Innuendo, the executive director and staff at The Henry & Betty...
BEVERLY HILLS - Miley Cyrus has just learned that her father the country music artist formerly known as Billy Ray Cyrus has just filed for divorce.
Billy Ray and his wife Tish, who looks exactly like Miley, have been married for 19 years.
Cyrus...
Commuters at Grand Central Station received the shock of a lifetime last night: George Orwell selling and signing copies of his books, right near the big clock in the terminal.
"Ya gotta strike while the iron is hot," Orwell told the crowd, e...
I received an email the other day telling of a diabolical surveillance device in the form of a mosquito that can fly around your home and "spy" on you, another NSA device to combine with all your telephone calls and internet correspondence that they...
SAN ANTONIO - San Antonio Spurs sharpshooters Danny Green and Gary Neal combined for 13, three-pointers to help the Spurs manhandle the world champion Miami Heat.
The Spurs ended up with 16 three-pointers and set an NBA Finals record for shots fro...
BEVERLY HILLS - Friends of Paris Hilton say that she is trying her hardest to keep from showing that she is thrilled that Lindsay Lohan is in rehab.
According to Ling Chow Rangoon with iRumors, Paris actually flew down to Louisiana to meet with Ma...
ATLANTA - TNT sports analyst Charles Barkley called NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell's recent comments "turrible, turrible, turrible".
Goodell responded to a request from ten United States Senators asking the owner of the Washington Redskins to chan...