Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Thursday, 18 August 2011

image for Jay Leno Considering Having Chin Reduction Surgery
This is a parking garage that Leno had built on his property to house his collection of over 200 vehicles.

HOLLYWOOD - The host of The Tonight Show recently stated that he is beginning to feel self-conscious about his gigantic chin.

Jay Leno talked freely with iRumors reporter Ling Chow Rangoon in his dressing room at Studio FU-199347 located on the lot at the NBC Studios in Burbank.

Leno, who is 61, but says that at times he feels 62, told Miss Rangoon that he does not really like to talk about his chin very much but that lately he has noticed that it is really starting to look even larger than it actually is.

Rangoon told Leno that she had never before seen such a humongous chin and that if he ever decides to get a tattoo to completely cover it that the ink alone would probably run close to $7,000.

Leno asked her if he could get her something to drink; perhaps a glass of rice water.

Rangoon told him not to get pissed off at her just because he has a chin that just happens to look a hell of a lot like Kim Kardashian's ass.

Jay asked her how the hell she manages to eat ice cream with chopsticks.

Rangoon gave him a thumbs up.

He then told her that he had called up a chin specialist in Tarzana, Dr. Beto Hobbshuckle and asked him about getting chin reduction surgery.

Dr. Hobbshuckle told him that he wanted him to come in and get his chin weighed with a brand new chin weighing mechanism system that had only recently been devised by a team of leading chin scientists in Eggersdorf, Germany.

The doctor informed Leno that he would actually be the first patient that he would get to try his new chin scale on. Leno smiled and asked if it was going to hurt in any way, shape, or form because he hates pain.

Dr. Hobbshuckle giggled and asked him that it depended on what exactly his definition of pain was. Leno replied, "Well Doc, let me put it this way, if it is a feeling anywhere on my body that causes me to yell out at the top of my effen lungs like a friggin banshee bitch with tremendous stomach cramps due to her period then I would consider that to be pain."

The doctor started laughing and told him that he was funny. Leno replied that he hopes so because that is how he feeds his family or actually his wife since he has no kids.

[EDITOR'S NOTE: Jay Leno has an extremely prominent jaw affliction known as Mandibular Prognathism also widely known by its scientific Latin name Jawfacto Infinitum Dammitis.]

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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