Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Wednesday, 3 August 2011

image for Justin Timberlake Reveals His Very Serious Voice Problem
Justin Timberlake has said that Mila Kunis (Shown in photo) knows more about sex than he even knows.

LOS ANGELES - Justin Timberlake, or as he prefers to be known as these days, Mila Kulis' "Main Squeeze" (pun intended) recently talked about his medical affliction.

Timberlake spoke openly with Missy Wonderbox of Hollywood Innuendo at a Pizza Doll in Avocado Heights.

The 30-year-old former member of the boy band *NSYNC stated that his family physician, Dr. Tate T. Towerflacker recently informed him that he has a very serious voice problem which is known as Tonsilgigantolosus.

Justin said that the affliction is very rare and that it only occurs in one in 2,000 singers, and he stressed professional singers and not singers you see on some of the reality shows.

Timberlake said that Dr. Towerflacker let him know that if he continues to sing that his voice could end up changing completely.

Justin asked him what he meant by that and the doctor told him that he could end up having a singing voice whose tone would lie somewhere between the voice of Fran Drescher and Gilbert Gottfried.

Timberlake fainted. When he came to he asked the doctor to explain exactly what Tonsilgigantolosus is.

Dr. Towerflacker asked him to imagine the throat region of a little bitty guppy with its tonsils so swollen that they are just about touching each other. Justin said okay. The doctor then told him to try and imagine the little bitty guppy all of a sudden swallowing a regular-sized peach.

Timberlake nodded. The doctor then said that if he continues to sing he will turn into that guppy. Justin asked him what happened when the guppy swallowed the peach.

The doctor looked down at his notes and told Justin that the little bitty guppy went up to that great big ocean in the sky.

Justin fainted again.

Mila Kunis was contacted by Hollywood Innuendo and she said that contrary to all of the rumors flying around that she is not pregnant with Justin's baby or Jake Gyllenhaal's baby for that matter.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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