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Wednesday, 11 May 2011

image for Noel Deals A Blow To TV Watchdog
Countdown. Pictured here before Deal or no Deal comes on directly after it has finnished

Celebrity beardy bloke, Noel Edmonds, was thanking his lucky stars this evening following a ruling that found him not guilty of misrepresentation in the presentation of his hit show, Deal or no Deal

The diminutive gnome-like former breakfast jock had been accused of cracking on that game on the show was being played 'skillfully' by the actors from Central Casting, who pretend to be members of the public and appear daily as contestants on the box-guessing-money-spinning extravaganza.

In a 264 page written ruling the adjudication committee found that although no skill was in evidence at any time during a 'game'; nevertheless the pixie-faced entertainer had to be cleared of all charges on the grounds that "he's a bit of a berk" and thus can't be held responsible for his somewhat over-ebullient outbursts on camera.

Edmonds, who's enjoying something of an Indian Summer regarding his show business career, was unrepentant after the hearing and insisted that people who guessed numbers between 1 and 22 were indeed exhibiting skill of the highest order. When it was suggested that a puppy shitting on the boxes at random was every bit as skillful, Edmonds vehemently denied it and went on to create a diversion by donning a brightly coloured and somewhat garish shirt that he had been keeping in a John Lewis carrier bag and hidden under the table.

However Noel's let-off by the broadcasting watchdog has set the alarm bells ringing all across TV land, as when questioned whether he might now bring his former Multi Coloured Swap Shop sidekick, Keith Chegwin, into 'Deal' he refused to rule out the suggestion.

One Deal or no Deal contestant, who wished to remain anonymous commented, "I'm so excited darling. My agent has put me up for the role of Bottom in the new Ken Branagh, so fingers crossed loves."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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