Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Tuesday, 18 January 2011

image for British Prostitute and X-Factor Contestant Chloe Mafia Hints That She Would Like To Have Simon Cowell's Baby
Chloe Mafia shown as she appeared on the BBC TV show, "Blimey I Done Went And Burned Me Muffins Ag'in."

LONDON - The London Revue Gazette is reporting that famed London prostitute Chloe Mafia, who can do some amazing as hell things with whipped cream, Maraschino cherries, and three Costa Rican bananas has announced that she would like for Simon Cowell to father her baby.

Mafia, who spells her name exactly like the mafia organizations of Italy and America, informed the LRG that she is extremely indebted to Simon Cowell for coming to her defense during last September's Monica Mint-Chloe Mafia feud.

Chloe who earns £160 [$247 U.S.] an hour revealed how Simon defended her against the Spanish prostitute Monica Mint who said that Chloe had no business appearing on the Simon Cowell produced show X-Factor because she was a 'professional.'

Mint expressed the fact that she was mystified that Cowell would let such a lowly woman of the evening appear on his highly prestigious show especially after she (Mint) had showed him the enlarged photos of (Chloe) Mafia and the three Chelsea football players.

[EDITOR'S NOTE: Monica Mint is one to talk since a highly reliable source has informed me that the Spanish hooker makes £140 {$223 U.S.} or a little less than Chloe Mafia makes. Plus I have personally seen several photos on the Internet showing Mint completely naked and openly frolicking on a small fishing boat with three Ipswich fishermen. ]

A London Bobby named Robert "Bobby" Cornwallis, who knows both women very well remarked that he has had the pleasure of having had the pleasure of being with both women in the carnal sense and he said that Chloe did some things to him that no other woman has ever done whereas Monica was mainly just an in and out type of 'working girl' who actually ate a strawberry crumpet during their vavavooming (effing) session.

Cornwallis added that he really likes Mafia because she has a great sense of humor along with having a great looking arse (ass). The great arsed Chloe has appeared on two of Britain's top rated shows, Hey Have You Seen Me Welly? and the sit-com Blimey I Done Went And Burned Me Muffins Ag'in.

In other news. The rumor that Pixie Lott and Louis Walsh were seen kissing passionately at Windsor Castle has been shown to have been a big, gigantic farkin lie.

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