Written by IainB
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Wednesday, 8 December 2010

image for Woody and Jessie caught 'in flagrante' by Buzz Lightyear
Woody may have to call on the troops in a bucket

Popular toy from the hit Disney Pixar films, Toy Story 1, 2 and 3, Woody The Cowboy, has been living up to his name.

Long time friend of Woody, Buzz Lightyear, has been seeing cowgirl Jessie for two films now, wooing her with his Latin dancing and foolish heroics. His friendship with the cowboy has been put under strain after he discovered Jessie and Woody behind the bookcase in Andy's room.

"I was mortified," said Buzz. "Woody and Jessie in reverse cowgirl! I was shocked."

Woody has tried to laugh it off. "Buzz has got it all wrong," he said. "Jessie was practising a new trick she was going to perform with Bullseye where she turns around and does a somersault back into the saddle."

Woody pulled at his jacket and chaps. "Do these clothes look like they come off? No, I'm stitched into them. The same is true of Jessie. Nothing could have happened. We're pre-school toys for Andy's sake!"

Buzz has a picture drawn by Etch, which has so embarrassed Jessie that she has refused to speak to anybody other than Barbie.

"Jessie's done, like, nothing wrong," said the infeasibly proportioned doll. "Her and Buzz, like, dance, she's never seen it as more than that, like. Who she plays 'Ride Em Cowboy' with is her business. She is like very upset with Woody, Buzz and Etch for this whole affair. She's a doll with, like, needs, you know."

Until Jessie comes forward with her side of the story, tension between Woody and Buzz remain at breaking point.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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