Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Monday, 29 November 2010

image for Cameron Diaz Photographed Playing With Alex Rodriguez's Baseballs Down In Mexico
Cameron Diaz, at the age of 38, shows that her puppies can still run with the best of them. (Photo courtesy of Tom Cruise).

CABO SAN LUCAS, Mexico - Cameron Diaz spent the Thanksgiving holiday down in sunny old Mexico with New York Yankees star Alex Rodriguez, aka A-Rod.

Diaz who at 38, is three years older than the Yankee pinstripper, told local reporters that she has always had a thing for Alex ever since she saw a photo of him playing with Kate Hudson's little, itty, bitty titties.

Cameron smiled as she told herself that if A-Rod was thrilled with Kate's baby tata's than he would literally hit his head on the bedroom ceiling if he ever saw her award-winning knockers.

[EDITOR'S NOTE: Cameron's hooters did win the title of Best Damn Rack In Hackensack back in 2001.]

A maid, who only wanted her first name mentioned Candelaria, and who works at The Pancho Villa Resort Villa, where the happy couple stayed, remarked that she saw Alex and Cameron frolicking on the beach and it looked like they were playing spin the Tequila bottle.

Candelaria noted that she also saw Cameron playing with the yankee baseball player's bat and balls.

Candy, as her ex-husband calls her, stated "Dee tu luff birds dey got so cott up in der tushing and feeling dat dey deed not notees dat Mr. Alex he had sleeped Mees Cameron's beekeenee bottom uff her...lemmy see...was de word, oh jes, ass."

Cameron later told a reporter for The Cabo San Lucas Morning Olé News that Alex had invited her to visit Mexico since he had two front row tickets to The George Lopez Commemorative Bullring in which Mexico's 2010 MVP Matador Donnie Alejandro Quesadillas was the featured bullfighter.

A-Rod said that Quesadillas is undefeated and has a 107-0 record.

From The Putting A Rumor To Bed Department: Bristol Palin, who took third place in this years Dancing With The Stars, has angrily denied that she asked her dance partner Mark Ballas to father her child so that the baby can grow up to one day win Dancing With The Stars coveted Mirror Ball Trophy.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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