Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Thursday, 9 September 2010

image for Angelina Jolie Reveals The Real Reason Why She Is Looking So Anorexic
Lately all that Angelina Jolie eats daily is an M&M with ketchup.

PARIS - Angelina Jolie was spotted in a popular Parisian grocery store and those who saw her could not believe how utterly skinny she has gotten.

Some whispered behind her back that she looks like Calista Flockhart. Others said she is starting to resemble Keira Knightley except without her big boobs, big lips, and big ovaries.

While she was at the market two elderly ladies offered her a croissant and told her that she needs to gain back about 20 pounds because she is starting to look like a pogo stick with hair and tits.

Jolie thanked the ladies for their nice suggestion and then told them that they should really mind their own freakin business since one needs to lose a midget in weight and the other one needs to buy some industrial thigh cellulite.

The two women walked away in a huff and Angelina threw a couple of French fries at the two as they darted over to the frozen food section.

A close friend of Jolie's said that ever since Brad told Oprah Winfrey that he is planning on leaving Angie and returning back to Jennifer Aniston that Jolie has hardly eaten at all and when she does it's just usually a single M&M with ketchup on it.

Angie told her hair stylist that she had to lose weight for her next motion picture in which she portrays the 1960s English model Twiggy, who stood 5 foot 10 inches tall and weighed 71 pounds.

SIDENOTE: Brad informed Larry King that plans are still in the talking stages but that it appears that he (Brad) could be starring with Jennifer (Aniston) in the motion picture Is That Plastic I Smell - The Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag Story.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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