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Topics: Pope, Music

Thursday, 17 November 2005

image for Simon Cowell launches Pope Idol
"you're photography skills are crap mate !"

London, England. Music mogul Simon Cowell will judge the latest reality game show to hit the small screen - Pope Idol.The show is sure to be hit, following on from Cowell's previous successes such as Popstars, Pop Idol and The Rabbi Factor.

OPPORTUNITY

At a hastily convened press conference in London's Dorchester hotel Cowell addressed journalists this morning, "ITV have agreed a deal to screen Pope Idol starting from next month. Depending on its success we may syndicate the show to other countries such as the US, Canada and hopefully, Iraq. My fellow judges will be Cardinal Cormac Murphy O'Connor, and Posh Spice. Entrants will be judged on their knowledge of the Bible, Catholic doctrine and waving to large crowds from a moving vehicle." O'Connor who is the leader of the Catholic Church in England and Wales joined Cowell at the launch along with former superfluous Spice Girl Posh Spice, better known as David Beckham's wife. " I think this is a great opportunity," the Cardinal was quoted as saying, "other Cardinals will now have the chance to prove to the British public they have what it takes to preside over the entire world's Catholic population."

"HONOUR"

Posh Spice said it was an honour to be asked to judge the competition which will hold regional auditions in eight major British cities over the next two months. " I live in Spain which is quite Catholic in some ways so hopefully I can bring some of that knowledge," said the England captain's spouse, "that and they're paying me quite a lot too !" Posh revealed she was looking forward to going back to Manchester after so long and that the final would be " a fantastic occassion with the contestants frantically praying to be liked" - a feeling she knows only too well herself.

CRITICS

Some members of society have criticised the move, claiming the competition will cheapen the Papacy. The Archbishop of Canterbury said the idea would give "false hope to hundreds of Cardinals who have no real chance of making it to the final". Others, including Tony Blair welcomed the decision saying it would bring transparency and glamour to an otherwide secretive process.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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