Written by Donnie Dogmeat
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Wednesday, 2 June 2010

image for Princess Fergie to appear in Star Wars VII
Star Wars heroine Princess Gingerbush

The financial woes of Sarah Ferguson may be over after she signed up yesterday to appear in a new science-fiction blockbuster.

Fergie will take a leading role in Star Wars VII - the Return of the Syphillis.

She has been offered £500,000 to play the part of Princess Gingerbush in the eagerly-waited film.

The exciting plot involves Princess Gingerbush embarking on an illicit affair with arch-villain Jobby Jabber the Cad (played by Major James Hewitt). The affair threatens to lead to the breakdown of the Monarchy and a new era where Republicans rule the universe.

Fergie has apparently been quoted as saying that she will also be able to persuade HRH The Grand Old Duke of Pork to take a cameo role in the movie.

Sources suggest that the Duke will appear in the final battle scenes of the movie, where he will be seen as a rear gunner.

"I would like it to be known that I was drunk when I married him," explained Fergie.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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