Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Thursday, 13 May 2010

image for Miley Cyrus Defends Her Grinding Lap Dance By Saying, "Hey People, I Had Shorts On"
Adam Shankman shown deleting the video of the lap dance he received from Miley Cyrus.

LOS ANGELES - Miley Cyrus was having a pedicure at The Rice Paddy of Vietnam Pedicure Palace when she was asked about the incident at the 'wrap party' for her movie The Last Song.

Miley asked if the reference was to the film's makeup artist Bubbles Flittberger putting make up on one of the cameraman's genitals or if it concerned her co-star Liam Hemsworth openly French kissing her stand-in Tittles Dupree, and causing an injury to her uvula.

Cyrus was told that it was neither and that it concerned her giving an erotically charged bump and grind lap dance to the motion picture's producer Adam Shankman.

Miley started laughing and said that she had forgotten all about that little insignificant incident and why was it effen being brought up now months and months later.

She was told that it was probably due to the fact that she was only 16 and the lap dance recipient is a quite mature man of 44.

Miley put down her bottle of Coke Zero, her cup of fried sushi bits, and remarked, "Looky. We were all feeling extremely happy. We had just finished filming several weeks in the horribly hot-as-hell Georgia heat, and most of the film's cast and crew were somewhat sloshed beyond normalcy.

I myself was feeling bad. I was a little bloated due to the fact that I had just started my mother friggin period, I had an effen pimple that had just appeared on my nose, and I had misplaced my freakin bra."

Cyrus went on to say that everyone was really groovin' to the music and she guesses that she just got caught up in the mood.

She pointed out that Shanky had just remarked to her that she looked like a million dollars in her super tight Daisy Duke short shorts.

Miley stated that she felt quite flattered and she instantly just started dancing and one thing led to another and before she knew it she was in fact giving him, what he called, the best lap dance of his entire adult life.

Cyrus noted that it was really no big deal. She blushed a little as she said, "Ya know, hey people I HAD shorts on. It's not like I was ya know, naked and had my wonderfully wondrous wazoo on display. And besides my director Adam Shankman happens to be ya know, gay. So hellooooo...ya know."

Miley has abruptly cancelled her scheduled appearance on Late Night With David Letterman because she found out that Dave was going to ask her very intimate questions about her infamous Georgia lap dance and was actually going to ask that she recreate the lap dance using his musical director Paul Shaffer in the place of Adam Shankman.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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