Mark Lowton has run afoul of the law again for hawking nude pictures of Cheryl Cole taken from the Hubble telescope.
Lowton managed to take the pictures by brazenly walking into the NASA control centre in Houston with a cup of coffee in one hand while smuggling in a roll of speaker wire and two electronic pencil sharpeners which he cleverly McGyvered into a Trojan horse virus machine which gave him immediate access and full control over the famous space telescope. Lowton then proceeded to redirect the Hubble from surveying the dark mysteries of origins of our universe down to the back yard deck where Miss Cole was sunbathing nude, she thought safely, in the privacy of her six bedroom home in Oxshott.
The "Girls Aloud" singer was voluptuously stroking her silken breasts spread eagled to avoid tan lines when she looked up and felt someone staring at her and saw the giant lens of the Hubble space telescope pointed directly at the dark mysteries of her universe.
The story was outed when Lowton attempted to sell the pirated paparazzi pics to fellow Chelsea team mates of Ashley Cole from the back of his Mini Cooper as the players were leaving their changing rooms at Stamford Bridge.
Nicholas Anelka said Lowton was charging double the rate he paid for nude pics of Katie Price and "She has more upstairs, full figure, the gouger!"