Written by Hydrogen Balloon
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Topics: Gay, Star Trek, Spock

Sunday, 11 April 2010

image for Leonard Nimoy Outs Mr. Spock
The Secret Life Of Mr. Spock

Hollywood, CA - Actor Leonard Nimoy shocked the entertainment world today by 'outing' his famous Star Trek character. Mr. Spock is "as queer as a three-dollar bill", according to Mr. Nimoy.

Star Trek creator Gene Roddenberry wanted the Vulcan to be openly gay, but TV censorship prohibited it from happening.

"Gene was a true visionary, decades ahead of his time." stated Mr. Nimoy. "He opened the door to both racial and sexual equality on the Enterprise Bridge. Too bad sexual orientation had to take a backseat--so to speak."

"On the first few episodes of Star Trek, I spoke the lines with a pronounced lisp." said the actor. "I also minced around the Enterprise Bridge in tight pants. I eyeballed all the guys and made bitchy remarks while extending a limp wrist. I was gayer than a Barbi Doll!"

Mr. Nimoy said network censors made them re-shoot the gay scenes.

"I guess the idea of a gay extra-terrestrial was too much for them!" he laughed. "Although David Bowie had quite a success with the idea many years later!" he laughed some more.

"I continued to play Mr. Spock as a closeted gay man. He obviously never married or had kids. He never had a real girlfriend either, except for that pathetic Nurse Chapel. Isn't it obvious now??" he smiled. "And don't even get me started on the Spock-Kirk relationship!"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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