Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Tuesday, 30 March 2010

image for Jesse James Says That He Has Never Met Ricky Martin
A photo that was taken of Jesse James on St. Patrick's Day.

LONG BEACH, California - Soon-to-be-ex-husband of Sandra Bullock, Jesse "Dick With Feet" James wants it made perfectly clear that he has never met Ricky Martin, alias "Purple" Martin.

James said that he was asked if there was any chance that the ex-Menudo singer could be "TattooGate's" Cycle Chick #5.

Jesse spit on the floor and said that he would rather go to bed with Ann Coulter, or Amy Winehouse, or even Whoopi Goldberg than to consider having "Licky Ricky" ride on the handlebars of his motorcycle.

The owner of West Coast Choppers stated that it is hard for him to believe that Ricky could be Dean Martin's son. When told that he wasn't he caught himself, smiled, and said, "Oh I mean Dean Martin's daughter."

In other news coming out of GayLand. Ellen DeGeneres says that there is absolutely no truth to the rumor that her friend Rosie O'Donnell has asked her to try and get her a date with Kara DioGuardi.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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