Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Saturday, 20 March 2010

image for The Anti-Tattoo Coalition of America States That Jesse James and  "Bombshell" McGee Prove That Tattoos Cause Infidelity
Highly tattooed Blink 182 drummer Travis Barker says he uses tattoos to ward of rabid squirrels.

YUMA, Arizona - The Anti-Tattoo Coalition of America which is based in Yuma, Arizona has stated that their belief that there is a direct correlation between tattoos and infidelity has once again been proven.

The ATCA Director Dr. Tab Hamsterfarken said that if one takes a very close look at the tattoos found on both Jesse James also known as Mr. Sandra Bullock, and Michelle "The Bombshell" McGee one will note a striking similarity and not just on the extremely bright colors.

Both individuals use tattoo signs, characters, and facial drawings that depict such elements as the weather, rough roads, and crisis, which all are indicative of marital turmoil.

Miss McGee has several tattoos of hurricanes, including 2005's Hurricane Katrina, which devastated Louisiana, East Texas, Mississippi, and parts of Southern New Hampshire.

McGee also has quite an extensive network of roads, highways, streets, boulevards, interstates, and dead end streets, one of which interestingly enough ends right at the base of her uterus.

Jesse James on the other hand, no pun intended, expressed, or implied has a tattoo of a 7.9 earthquake which shows hitting Van Nuys, California. A second tattoo depicts the Santa Ana Winds blowing the roofs off of tenement houses in La Brea, La Habra, and La Later.

And Jess has three tattoos that show Sarah Palin's house with Sarah standing on her front porch and pointing across a vast expanse of land, while saying that she can see Russia.

Dr. Hamsterfarken was asked why is it that people feel the need to have a tattoo. He smiled and said that tattoos were first invented millions of years ago, by cavemen who used to put their names on their t-shirts to show everyone what their name was.

Later, during World War II, the Nazi's used them as a means of showing the inferior world that they were better than anyone because they only used the most expensive ink in their tattoos.

And five decades later, Blink 182 drummer Travis Barker told both Dick Clark and Ryan Seacrest that he personally used tattoos as a way to ward of rabid bats, squirrels, hippos, GOPers, and penguins.

For further reading on the interesting topic of body defacing, I mean tattooing, log on to www.titfortattattoos.tit

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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