Written by Abel Rodriguez
Rating:

Share/Bookmark
Print this
Topics: John Edwards, Haiti

Saturday, 23 January 2010

image for John Edwards Goes To Haiti: Haitian Government Warns Him Not To Get Anyone Pregnant
A photo of Baby Quinn Edwards father taken two minutes after he FINALLY admitted it. Tsk-Tsk.

PORT-AU-PRINCE, Haiti - Senator John Edwards, hot off of his admittance that he is in fact little Quinn's biological father, has arrived in Haiti's capital city to help in fund-raising proceedings.

Raul P. Escritor, a representative for the Haitian government has warned the senator from North Carolina that he had better not dare get a Haitian woman pregnant.

Escritor stated that if it is learned that Edwards even had a semblance of a dalliance with a citizen of Haiti he will be arrested, tried, convicted, and have his Little John [EXPLETIVE ACT DELETED - OUCHERS!]

Edwards has assured the government officials that while he is in Haiti he promises to keep his (blank) in his pants and out of the reach of the Haitian women.

He went on to add that he has really and truly learned his lesson and that he knows that if he ever gets another woman pregnant he will not really have to concern himself too much about it, because Elizabeth (his wife) has vowed to shoot the sucker (penis) off with a 12-gauge shotgun.

In other news. Japan's national beverage agency, Yu Drinky, has just released the results of a national survey that states that Saki has just been passed by Diet Dr. Pepper as the most popular beverage of Japan.

Make Abel Rodriguez's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!

Print this

Stop - Warning

The story you are trying to access may cause offense, may be in poor taste, or may contain subject matter of a graphic nature.

This story was written as a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

To confirm you have acknowledged this warning, and wish to continue to read the article, please click the following link.



Otherwise, please click here to go back to the home page.




Share/Bookmark

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Email:

What's 4 multiplied by 3?

9 15 12 16

Go to top