Written by IainB
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Topics: Music, Sugababes

Wednesday, 23 September 2009

image for Sugarbabes Split - again!
Sugar, yesterday.

Long running soap-opera popular beat combo all girl trio Sugarbabes have split. . .Again.

Keisha Buchanan formed the group back in 1998 with then friends Mutya Buena and Siobhan Donaghy. The pressures of popularity, fame, wealth and as many M&Ms as they could eat (three, apparently, one each) took it's toll on the three and Siobhan left the band in 2001 claiming that Mutya was taking the red M&M.

The up coming album was re-recorded with Heidi Range the new member, bringing a new direction to the group, and a new found like of Cadbury's Roses. However when Mutya discovered Keisha secretly eating all the hazelnut whirls, she stormed out of the band and was replaced by Amelle Berrabah in 2005.

Although outwardly compatible, there were instant rifts in the group when it was discovered that Amelle did not like any kind of chocolate. It was not long before Amelle and Heidi had sided against the only original member, Keisha, in an attempt to have all chocolate banned from their dressing rooms.

This week, Keisha could not take it any more, and has quit the group.

She will be replaced by Jade Ewen, who did slightly better in Eurovision than Britain's previous entry. Jade also doesn't like chocolate, so the record label are hopeful that this will be the last change.

"We hope that this will be the last change to the group," said Earnest Inuit, PR Guru for Island Records. "We have successfully taken the brand that is the Sugarbabes and replaced all the feisty members with ones we can control."

On being asked if losing the last original member meant that the group was not really the Sugarbabes any more, Inuit dismissed this.

"Like a gate that has had every panel and hinge replaced over the course of a century, it is still a gate."

This perplexing statement left the assembled press confused, and Inuit slipped away.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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